“Some people believe football is a matter of life and death. I am very disappointed with that attitude. I can assure you it is much, much more important than that”
This quote by the late, great Bill Shankly is perhaps the best to sum up what football means to many millions of people around the world.
Own Goals! is a collection of the world’s funniest quotations from commentators, managers and players.
Some of you might be critical that most of the quotes are British and you would have a good point! But let’s be clear about this: we invented this game and we think that quite honestly our pundits are the best and funniest in the world!
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“Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air for even longer”
David Acfield
“It looks as if I am trying to stab Dave Bassett in the back but I’m not holding a gun to anybody’s head”
Mickey Adams
“Defoe’s cramp might come from drinking caffeine. I used to get cramp because I put 20 . . . pints of lager down my neck”
Tony Adams
“Fergie said I was a Manchester United player in the wrong shirt. I said he was an Arsenal manager in the wrong blazer”
Tony Adams
“I’d rather not talk to anyone and just go and walk my chickens”
Tony Adams
“Last night, we were the best team on the day”
Roy Aitken
“If Ricardo Gardner should have been sent off, there should have been four players sent off for each side. So the match should have ended up six against six”
Sam Allardyce
“A lot of hard work went into this defeat”
Malcolm Allison
“It's not true. Technically you can say it’s true, yes”
Steve Archibald
“We have been saying this, both pre-season and before the season started”
Len Ashurst
Media commentator and former football player and manager.
Known as "Big Ron". Ronald Franklin Atkinson was born in Liverpool, England, on 18 March 1939.
He played for Oxford United before managing such teams as Cambridge United, West Bromwich Albion, Manchester United, Aston Villa and Nottingham Forest. He led Manchester United to FA Cup victory in 1983 and 1985.
As a media commentator, he become one of Britain's best-known football pundits and his remarks have become known as "Big-Ronisms" or "Ronglish".
He courted controversy in 2004 when, believing his microphone to be off whilst commentating for ITV Sport, he made a racist remark about a player. He regretted his error of judgment immediately and offered his resignation, which was accepted.
“At international level, giving the ball away doesn’t work too often”
Ron Atkinson
“Beckenbauer really has gambled all his eggs”
Ron Atkinson
“He actually looks a little twat, that Totti”
Ron Atkinson
“He is without doubt the greatest sweeper in the world, I'd say, at a guess”
Ron Atkinson
“His white boots were on fire against Arsenal, and he'll be looking for them to reproduce tonight”
Ron Atkinson
“If Glenn Hoddle said one word to his team at half time, it was ‘concentration’ and ‘focus’”
Ron Atkinson
“I know where he should have put his flag up, and he'd have got plenty of help”
Ron Atkinson
“I'm going to make a prediction – it could go either way”
Ron Atkinson
“I never comment on referees and I’m not going to break the habit of a lifetime for that prat”
Ron Atkinson
“I think that was a moment of cool panic there”
Ron Atkinson
“I would also think that the action replay showed it to be worse than it actually was”
Ron Atkinson
“I would not say he [David Ginola] is the best left winger in the Premiership, but there are none better”
Ron Atkinson
“That boy throws a ball further than I go on holiday”
Ron Atkinson, on Dave Challinor of Tranmere
“The keeper should have saved that one but he did”
Ron Atkinson
“The Spaniards have been reduced to aiming aimless balls into the box”
Ron Atkinson