Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Epilogue
About the Author
“Let every nation know, whether it wishes us well or ill, that we shall pay any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend, oppose any foe, in order to assure the survival and the success of liberty.
“This much we pledge—and more.”
John F. Kennedy
President of the United States
Inauguration speech
Jan 20, 1961
FINISHED WITH DELIBERATIONS, the officers shuffled back into the courtroom. The grinding sounds of their combat boots and the scuffing of their chairs on the raised platform, built just for the trial, broke the silence. Two colonels, three lieutenant colonels and one major flanked Brigadier General Ben Stratton. They silently took their seats.
Stratton slipped on his reading glasses, opened a piece of paper folded only once at the midline and read to all assembled in the room, “As President of this court-martial, it is my duty to inform you that the members of the court, two-thirds of which were present at the time a secret written ballot was cast, have reached their verdict. As to the charges and specifications, the court finds the accused …”
Scotty Hayes braced himself for the reading of the verdict.
SCOTTY HAYES WALKED DOWN the hallway at Palms High as if he didn’t have a care in the world. There was a bit of James Dean in his walk, Elvis in his smile and Jerry Lee Lewis in his attitude.
Here and there classmates nodded, said “Hi” or gave him a quiet smile.
He didn’t seek out eye contact with classmates, but didn’t fail to acknowledge anyone who recognized him with his winning smile or a wave, or even a quiet, “Hi there.” Though not a member of the scholarly elite or athletic royalty, he was popular enough.
Scotty stopped at his locker, spun the worn combination dial on the warped door with a snap of his wrist and a hint of body English and popped it open with ease. He ignored the fact that the inside of his locker was chaotic and in need of a good cleaning. Crushed, ripped and crumpled notebook pages peeked out of the spaces between rarely used textbooks stacked at reckless angles.
He pulled a pencil from behind his ear and flipped it end over end at the triangle opening formed by stacked math, history and chemistry books. He was pleased with himself when the pencil landed inside the small opening on the very first try.
“Hayes. You goin’ to practice, man?” A classmate slid into a spot against the adjacent locker, a move designed to allow him to speak with Scotty without having to take his eyes off the girls walking the halls and stopping at their own lockers.
“Mal, have I ever missed a practice?”
Malcolm Striever jabbed his thumb over his shoulder toward the vice principal’s office. “No, but just about anything might a’ happened in there. For all I know, you might be on your way to solitary for ten years.”
Scotty looked around for other students who might be in earshot. “Hey,” he whispered, “why don’t you broadcast it over the intercom, man?”
Malcolm lowered his voice. “Well, he didn’t throw ya’ out of school, did he?”
Scotty smiled. “What? For cutting a few classes?”
“It could happen. I’m guessing Old Man Skerritt’s about had it with you. Did he give you his ‘Good students are not truant students’ speech? I’ve heard it about once a year since I was a sophomore. I can almost repeat it word for word.”
“Let me worry about Skerritt.” He playfully punched Malcolm’s shoulder. “Relax. No big deal.”
Malcolm looked at his watch. “Scotty, we better get on over to practice before Coach Huffman has our asses. Anyway, we get there early I can check out girl’s cheerleading practice and watch long-legged Jeanie get all worked up over you.”
Scotty pulled his letter jacket from his locker and slammed the door, spinning the combination dial in one fluid move. He threw the jacket over his shoulder and shook his head. “I got about as much chance with her as I do with Marilyn Monroe.”
“The Marilyn who’s been dead for over a year?”
“That’s my point.”
The two walked down the hallway to the exit, Malcolm struggling to control his notebook and several textbooks, Scotty empty-handed.
Track practice over, Scotty sat on the long narrow bench in a canyon of athletic equipment lockers. He kicked his spikes into his own with one foot while putting on a dry t-shirt. Like his book locker, his gym locker was a messy collection of dirty socks, some textbooks, knotted Ace bandages, and equipment from three different sports. All of it smelling of
Malcolm dropped his towel on the bench, pulled a comb out of his own locker and began combing is wet hair, naked.
“Hey, man! Put some clothes on. It’s bad enough we all got to see your skinny ass in the shower. You can put something on now. Give us a break. There’s only so much ugly we can take.”
“Fuck you, Hayes. You’re just jealous.”
Scotty laughed. “Malcolm, you are really not from this planet, are you?”
A booming voice interrupted them. “Whoa! Hold on, ya’ll. Check this shit out.”
Scotty and Malcolm turned to find Paul Wynn standing at the other end of the bench still in his track sweats wearing a bright green windbreaker with the word Tulane emblazoned across the chest.
Scotty knew Paul as an okay athlete who always did his homework for classes. He was not unpopular, and as a jock, he was unlikely to set a state record or be named to an All-American team. But as a football lineman, he had the advantage of being big and nearly impossible to move. Beyond that, he was no one special.
Malcolm tried to speak while wobbling on one foot and stepping into his briefs. “Where’d you get the jacket, Wynn? You steal it?”
“Screw you, Striever. A guy from the Tulane’s Alum Association left it with the coach.” He mugged, modeling the jacket. “Cool, huh?”
Scotty looked back to his locker and pulled out his street clothes, saying nothing.
“Why you, man?” Malcolm laughed. “You wash his car for him? Or what?”
“No, asshole. He brought the jacket so he’d have a pocket to put this in.” Wynn held up an opened envelope and waved it for all to see. “My ticket, ya’ll. This is it. Can you believe it? A full ride at Tulane. I’m goin’ to play football for the Green Wave. What are you doing next year, Malcolm?”
A few cheers and some good-natured remarks came from different corners of the locker room. Everyone except Scotty appeared to be happy for Paul Wynn.
No one noticed the coach watching the whole thing through the doorway to his office. Leaning back in his chair he yelled out, “Hayes? In my office. Now!”
Malcolm stuck his head through the neck of a sweatshirt. “Shit, Hayes. What did you do, now?”
“Yes, Coach?”
“Close the door, Hayes.” Coach John Huffman was twice Scotty’s age and more than twice his size. A West Virginia State baseball hat was perched on the back of his head. He nodded at a straight-backed chair on the other side of his cluttered office. “Sit. I want to talk to you, Hayes.”
Scotty quickly searched his memory for something he might have done wrong at practice. He sat stiffly, waiting for the coach to set the tone, watching him for some clue, if only to get out in front of whatever the bad news if only for a fraction of a second.
With his back to Scotty, Huffman asked, “What do you think about all that out there?”
“All that, Coach?”
“Wynn’s good news.”
“Oh… Good, I guess. He wanted to get into Tulane. To play ball there. Yeah. Good.”
The coach lifted a sheaf of papers from his desk and then dropped them back onto it. “Grades.”
“Grades?”
“Yep. Semester grades. Wynn’s, Striever’s, yours, and every other senior’s grades. Wynn’s got ’em. Good ones. And he’s a pretty fair football player on top of it all.” The coach spun his chair around and looked directly at him.
Scotty knew whatever Coach Huffman would have to say next, it would not be praise for his grade point average.
“You aren’t settin’ any records. Are you, son?”
Scotty looked down at his shoes and shook his head. “No, sir. I guess not.”
Coach Huffman sighed and pushed his cap farther back on his head. “I had pretty high hopes for you when you walked onto my ball field three years ago. You were good. I thought we had the time to get you better.” He hesitated and picked up a football wedged between a file cabinet and his in-box. He rolled the ball around in his fingertips as if looking for the laces, about to make a pass then he stopped and looked back at Scotty. “But, son, you never got any better.
“You see, the difference between you and Wynn is he worked. He didn’t even have the moves you had when he started here, but he lapped you, son. That’s why he’s going to Tulane, and you aren’t.”
Scotty had no reply.
“Boy, you got t’go into life like you need to go into a football game—with your hair on fire and smoke comin’ out your ass. I was hopin’ you’d do that by now.”
“I’m sorry, Coach.”
Huffman pointed out at the door to the locker room. “That’s not going to be you.”
“What’s not, Coach?”
“I’m sorry no one’s going to send you a letter or bring you a school windbreaker. You’re not getting a jock scholarship to some college. Ain’t that right?”
“I guess not, Coach.”
The coach took a breath and exhaled his disappointment. “You’re a good kid, Hayes. But there’s no fire in you. Colleges recruit boys with ass-kicking ball playing moves and okay grades or better. Can you honestly say you qualify in either category?”
Again, Scotty didn’t reply. He just stuck his hands into his letter jacket pockets and stared at his shoelaces.
“We both know the answer, don’t we?”
Scotty summoned up some optimism but was unable to deliver it with much conviction. “Coach, I’ll find some way to play ball at some school. I’m sure there’s someone who’ll take me on.”
“Son, you’re a senior and time’s pretty much run out for you. You frittered away your chances. You can’t create a reputation with what’s left of the school year. Heck, you only got a decent chance of making my track team before you graduate. I’m sure high school has been fun and filled with great memories, but it’s not some place where you’ve done much to launch a sparkling career at any goddamn thing, far as I can see.”
Scotty didn’t argue.
“Hell, even if you made the sports page of every paper between now and graduation you got a transcript filled with some pretty shitty grades you can’t ever change. Your record won’t ever go away. And how were your SATs?”
Scotty looked up and shrugged.
“I’m not surprised. Nobody makes crappy grades and then goes out and smokes the SATs.
“Look, I’ve enjoyed having you on my teams. You’ve always been easy goin’ and even helpful to some teammates. But I don’t know how to advise you now. You’re going to have to get serious about things or just plain starve to death. If I could, I’d help you, ’cause I like you. But you’ve got to admit you haven’t been leaning into it much. So you go on home and get those wild thoughts of being invited to some college somewhere out of your head. It’ll jus’ mess you up to think it’s gonna’ happen. ’Cause it ain’t. It just ain’t gonna’ happen for you.”
“I’m goin’ back some day, come what may, to Blue Bayou…” Scotty tried to sing along with Roy Orbison’s voice squeezing through the small speaker of the AM radio perched on the windowsill in his room, but soon gave up when he could no longer reach the high notes.
He finished stuffing a few things into a tired duffel bag once owned by his father. It was one of only two things Scotty had to remind him of Jake Hayes. The other was encased in a small blue box trimmed with gold. He picked it off a makeshift bookshelf in the converted sun porch which served had as his bedroom all through his high school years.
He opened the box with great care and held it securely in both hands. Inside a blue ribbon, trimmed with red and white, held the brass Distinguished Service Cross Medal against the fake velvet backing. His father, who never even knew he had earned it, only wore it on his uniform at his burial. Jake Hayes was killed in action the day before his twenty-second birthday in Pusan-Ri, Korea. He was a medic with an airborne infantry company decimated by wave after wave of North Koreans. For his actions, he was awarded the country’s second-highest award for valor in battle.
Scotty held the open medal box and thought about taking it with him. With effort, he could summon up his father in his uniform, wearing highly polished paratrooper boots. He was tall and lean. More Scotty couldn’t pull from his memory. Everything else he remembered about Jake was from yellowing photos with scalloped edges Kitty had kept anchored to the black craft paper pages of a few albums.
Placing the box back on the shelf over his perpetually unmade bed, Scotty looked around his room. The things he would leave behind were a schoolboy’s things—track medals, a football letter certificate on the wall, his baseball glove. His small homemade closet was half filled with clothes he would have no use for where he was going.
He swung around on the edge of his bed and looked at the things on the nearby desk. It had been a catchall and not a place where he’d done any real homework. He fingered the track medal hanging by a ribbon from his desk lamp. He won it at a Divisional meet running the 440 relay with Joe Blithe who was now at State. Below it, the baseball photo of him and the junior varsity team reminded him only two of the eleven boys on the team were still in Belton.
The only high school in the area, Palms High managed to graduate nearly three hundred students that year from all over the county. For graduates, there was little to keep them in Belton. There was no industry and few jobs. The population was mostly farm workers and retirees who couldn’t afford to enjoy the luxuries of towns like nearby Sarasota.
Graduation and Scotty’s summer had passed without event. He had a couple of part-time jobs. Each ended quickly. Suddenly, the friends he just assumed would be around weren’t. They’d gone off to college, moved away to jobs that filled their days, or left Belton for the service. Now it was Scotty’s turn to leave.
He clipped the strap to the closure on the top of the duffel bag and dropped it into the center of his bed.
“Scotty? Scotty, you still here, honey?” His stepmother’s voice, husky from chain-smoking Pall Malls and drinking too much Wild Turkey was fading from sixteen hours of working two jobs. Her voice came from her bedroom at the opposite end of the small tract house.
“Yeah. I’m here.”
“You won’t leave without sayin’ good-bye to me, will you, honey?” Kitty Hayes asked.
“No. I won’t.” He checked his watch. “I’m not leaving ’til morning.”
It was well after midnight when he made one final check to be sure he had everything, and then found his way to Kitty’s bedroom. He wasn’t looking forward to saying good-bye to her.
His stepmother had come home from work while he was packing and grabbed something to eat on her way through the kitchen. Scotty could see she hadn’t even taken the time to take off her shoes or finish her sandwich. She had dozed off on top of her built-in Hollywood bed in her small bedroom.
Careful not to wake her, he gently pulled a lit cigarette from her fingers and crushed it in the overflowing ashtray balanced on a small ledge on the wall near her bed.
He looked at the tiny tired woman half covered by a throw, still wearing her apron from work. Kitty meant continuity for Scotty. Even though she wasn’t his real mother, she’d been loyal and loving. He had no memory of his real mother who died when he was an infant in a freak railway crossing accident. As long as he could remember, Kitty had been there.
After Jake died, Kitty worked days and nights tending bar, waiting tables and taking odd jobs to pay the rent and keep food on the table for the two of them. She had no other skills and traded her smile, her figure and her energy for a paycheck. Scotty hadn’t noticed how the years had slowly aged her and taken their toll on her. His memories of the two of them playing catch, swimming in the Gulf and watching Bonanza together were as fresh as if they had done those things that week.
Still, time and loneliness wore on her. He ignored the changes and how she had long since learned to soften the sharp edges of her life with too much bourbon and too many painkillers.
He unfolded the throw she hadn’t had the strength to spread out before she drifted off and covered more of her small torso only inches from being more off than on the bed. He didn’t want to wake her, but he didn’t want to leave either. He picked up the magazine left open and face down on her small makeup table stool. Reader’s Digest—flipping it over he noticed she had also turned down the corner of a page. It was Kitty’s attempt to improve herself. She had kept a promise to herself to read each issue for as far back as he could remember.
He sat down to spend a quiet minute with her before he had to get serious about the last details of his departure. He would miss her. He remembered how she had looked when he was a small boy. She was pretty then. Her bright smile came sparingly now. Her hair was stiff with too much hair spray. Gone was the warm straw color he’d remembered from a decade earlier. Now, it was brassy. Her makeup was caked and smudged—applied in successive layers as she had gone from one job to the other during her long day. He didn’t care about those things. For his entire life, there’d only been one person he could count on, one person he could trust, one person who hadn’t left him—Kitty Hayes.
She had no one, and he had her. He worried about her health, the stream of losers she took up with and her ever-present loneliness. He was torn over leaving, but he couldn’t stay. He had to report to Fort Benning, still a whole state and over five hundred miles away.
He looked around the room, knowing he might not see it for a while. On her messy makeup table, she’d wedged a portable record player between an oval mirror balanced on the corner and the wall of the small bedroom. The script on the side of the record player proudly announced Hi-Fi. The box itself was laminated with grained vinyl in an alligator skin pattern. On the spindle stood three more 78s ready to drop down on top of the Johnny Mathis album resting on the flocked turntable. Scotty had heard those same albums over and over again, complete with the popping and scratching unique to each.
The room smelled of Kitty’s perfume and was overpowered by something in the makeup she used liberally to hide imperfections in her once smooth complexion. Scotty noted the compact containing pressed powder showed more shiny bottom than product, reminding him how short the money had always been. He wondered how much he would be able to afford to send her once he was actually in the Army.
She stirred without waking up. He still had things to do, but first leaned over to gently kiss her on the forehead before he quietly slipped out of the room.
He had waited for Kitty to wake up, but hesitated to rouse her just to say goodbye. She needed her sleep more than she needed an emotional goodbye. Hell, he was only going to be gone for nine weeks, and he’d be back on leave before he would be stationed somewhere for any length of time.
He looked at his watch one more time and made up his mind to call her later on during the day after she got to work. He picked up his bag to leave but stopped at the front door to look around the cramped quarters.
He wouldn’t miss much, especially the plastic laminate furniture or the couch so sunken in the middle getting out of it was a chore. The aluminum foil on the rabbit ears of the Emerson black and white TV was less effective than wishful. And the kitchen floor was in bad need of new linoleum. What was there had given way to worn spots where most of the traffic had broken through to the cream colored fiber beneath the speckled yellow and maroon pattern. Maybe he’d try to replace it while he was home on leave. Leave—it seemed such a long way off. For sure, he had slept his last night there. Once he walked out the door, he’d forever come back as a visitor.
He was excited about going somewhere new but anxious it was off to the Army as he opened the door and stepped out into the humid Florida morning. He walked to the end of the front walk, which died into a curbless side street and stepped through the small wire gate in the fenced-in front yard. He took a moment to glance back at the aging, mildew stained Florida cottage with its cracked jalousied windows.
With his entire summer’s savings—thirty-nine dollars—in his pocket, Scotty stuck out his thumb along the interstate snaking its way north to Georgia. A trucker whose most distracting feature was a large, bobbing Adam’s Apple gave Scotty his first ride and spent the first two hours telling Hayes how he was making a huge mistake by not enlisting in the Marine Corps, as the driver had done. He hammered on about how wimpy soldiers were when compared Marines and how the Marine Corps made a man out of him.
Hayes tried to politely nod in agreement, but the Army wasn’t his idea, it was his local Draft Board’s.
The truck driver dropped Scotty off in Waycross about the time the roads were filling up with people threading their way home from work. He was cutting off toward the coast, and Scotty would have to find another ride to Columbus.
As the truck pulled out, Scotty looked around. There was nothing close by except warehouses and the railhead. He had no idea which direction would be most likely to take him to food and lodging, so he just set out toward the brightest lights, all neon.
The signs on the wall said pizza and Budweiser. Scotty looked around inside the small bar before picking out a stool. The place was almost empty and smelled of beer and stale cigarettes. A jukebox at the far end of the room pounded out a Beach Boys tune still high on the charts, often repeated on radio stations across the country.
The bartender, a withered woman in her fifties, wore a stained apron to protect her as she washed glasses in the bar sink and stacked them on the drying rack next to it. She looked up at Scotty, “What’ll it be, sugar?”
“A Bud. And a slice of pizza,” he said as he threw his leg over a stool right in front of her.
As she wrote the order down, he pulled a five out of his pocket and placed it on the bar between them.
She stuffed the order up under a clip on a hanging wheel connecting the bar to the kitchen through a small window. “Guess you’re over eighteen, hon,” she half asked and half announced then picked up two glasses and dropped them into the sink.
“Yes ma’am,” he said, suddenly feeling a little foolish for emphasizing the difference in their ages. He reached into his shirt pocket for his Camels, a new habit he had thought would make him look older. He lit a cigarette with a cough and experienced a wave of nausea.
The barkeep looked up at him, her arms elbow deep in sudsy water. “You gonna’ make it there?”
Covering, Scotty blew a small amount of smoke skyward and touched his tongue with his fingertips. “Loose tobacco. I’ll be okay.”
She wiped her arms on her apron and a bar towel and nodded toward the two taps behind the bar top. “Draft or bottle?”
Scotty tried to sound worldly, “Draft. That’s my poison.”
She poured his beer and tilted the excess head off before finally topping it off. “It’ll be a bit for y’er pizza.”
The beer was cool and welcoming. He was no stranger to drinking. Around Palms High, he had enjoyed the reputation as one who could hold his liquor. He didn’t get wild or hostile when he drank. Still, he wanted to look like having a beer in a bar was routine rather a relatively new experience.
While he waited for his pizza, Scotty crossed the room to the pay phone and called Kitty at work. Actually speaking with her was nearly impossible. The noise in the background at her bar coupled with the Johnny Cash record on the jukebox in Scotty’s bar and marked the conversation with pleas on each end to repeat things. He was frustrated by the call, knowing there’d probably not be many chances to speak with her once he got to Fort Benning.
The pizza came with a second beer and Scotty enjoyed both, half watching a black and white television on the corner of the bar top. Customers came and went but mostly stayed. Soon all of the stools at the bar were occupied, and the noise level completely drowned out the jukebox and the television.
Scotty played with the ring of water on the bar top. Should he continue to thumb his way to Columbus, Georgia that night or find a place to stay? Before he could decide, an argument broke out behind him.
A drunk was trying too hard to convince a woman to sit down and have a drink with him. She kept refusing, and he kept insisting. Finally, he grabbed hold of her wrist and tried to force her to sit down.
Before he realized it Scotty heard himself say, “Hey, leave her alone.” It wasn’t like him. The words just spilled from him without warning.
The drunk tried to focus on Scotty. “Butt the fuck out, asshole.” He tightened his grip on the woman and pulled her toward a chair at his table.
Scotty looked around the room hoping to find someone else willing to get involved. No one was volunteering. He took a sip of his beer, not wanting to get in the middle of it but wanting even less to look like he was backing away. He stood up from his bar stool hoping the gesture would be enough.
The drunk thrust his chin out defiantly. “What? You got a problem, asshole?”
Scotty stepped toward the drunk and tried a less confrontational tone. “Listen, pal. Can’t you see she wants to be left alone? There must be a dozen other women coming here tonight who’d like to have a drink with you.”
The drunk dropped the woman’s wrist and made a failed attempt to stand up in Scotty’s face. He fell back into his chair and became even angrier because he had made himself look so stupid. On his next attempt, he leaped to his feet and overshot his mark bumping into Scotty’s chest, headfirst.
Scotty hit the man’s shoulders with the heels of both hands, stopping his forward momentum and propelling him backward, over his chair and onto the floor.
Unsure of how the man would react next, Scotty braced for a fight, but the drunk only got up on his hands and knees and began to vomit.
Scotty threw his arm out to ease the woman away from the splatter.
The bartender cried out, “Shit, Earl. Your ass is out of here this time. Get out of my bar! Now!” She flipped up the hinged section of the bar top with a bang, ran into the middle of the room and bent over Earl screaming at him, pointing out someone would have to clean up after him, and she wasn’t going let him into her bar ever again. She finally threatened to call the cops as Earl staggered out the door.
“How do I ever thank you, hon?”
Scotty turned to find the woman from the argument standing next to him, her hip leaning against the bar. Up close she wasn’t as young as he would have guessed. Maybe twelve or thirteen years older than he was—in her early thirties. He wasn’t sure what to say. “It’s nothing. Don’t worry about it. Ah, I’m sorry he was such a jerk.” He stumbled over his words.
She was tall which added to her nice shape. He quickly recognized he was staring and hoped she hadn’t caught him eyeing her.
“Buy you a beer?” She hopped up onto the stool next to his and reached for his pack of cigarettes.
He looked around the landing at the top of the stairs leading to her apartment, uncomfortable. The place was quiet and clean and even had a carpeted hallway. But he was too excited by the prospect of spending the night with her to take in more of her place. He tried to act like going home with her wasn’t a big thing for him. But he, like his friends, had talked more about sex than they’d actually experienced. And spending the night with an older good-looking woman was simply unheard of. Still, he didn’t want her to know the night could be a milestone for him.
It wasn’t as if he had never been with a girl. He’d enjoyed some stolen moments in the back seats of cars and more than a little hurried petting in forbidden places, but he had never been with a woman. Not a woman like her.
Her name was Liz. Inside the apartment, she excused herself and told Scotty to make himself at home while she showered. The apartment was very small—one room with a hotplate in the corner and a bathroom. He picked up a magazine off a table near the bed and flipped through it without anything grabbing his attention. He could smell the freshness of a woman in her bath coming through the door left ajar. He wondered if she expected him to join her or if she was just letting the steam escape from the windowless bathroom trapped in the center of the apartment building? He opted to wait for more encouragement from her.
He felt a flutter in the pit of his stomach when he heard her turn off the shower. Whatever the evening held was going to happen as soon as she came out of the bathroom.
He’d been so sure she was coming on to him in the bar but wasn’t quite so sure as they walked to her apartment and she had chosen neutral topics to talk about.
He looked up from the magazine to find Liz standing in the door, her hair wrapped in a towel, drying her naked body with another. She seemed so comfortable. Her body was toned and just short of muscular but very feminine. Long legs and a very small waist set off her breasts.
He’d never seen a totally naked woman before. And he’d never been completely naked with one either. This wasn’t like exposed body parts with nervous high school girls worried about being caught.
She smiled, stopped drying herself and nodded toward the bathroom. “Your turn, honey. Want me to wash your back?” She laughed.
Scotty wasn’t sure if he should just exit the bathroom naked or if he should wear his jeans. Still unsure of her intent, he opted to wrap a towel around his midsection and see if it wouldn’t provide him some middle ground to go either way.
He opened the door only to find her already in bed, still naked. Her damp hair brushed her shoulders. Her arms were gently crossed over her midsection, the sheet just covering her lower torso. Scotty felt awkward and didn’t know exactly where to look.
“You coming to bed?” she asked, pulling back the covers for him.
As he stepped to the side of the bed, she reached up and untucked the corner of the towel around his waist, letting it fall to the floor. She placed her other hand on the back of his upper thigh and gently pulled him toward her.
BY NOON THE NEXT DAY Scotty was still looking for another ride out of Waycross. He spent eighty-one cents on a Coke and a bag of salted peanuts at a truck stop along Highway 41. His money was running very low, but he’d get twenty dollars as soon as he got to Benning to be deducted from his first month’s seventy-eight dollar paycheck. He’d never much thought about money before. They didn’t have much money, but Kitty had taken care of most of the money in his life. He’d never thought of money from his few odd jobs as paying for essentials.
“Hey, you need a ride?”
Scotty saw an enormous woman wearing a muumuu and a scarf covering her hair. She pumped gas into a two-gallon gas can sitting on the fender of her Corvair. “Sure do,” he said.
“North or south?”
“What?”
“Which way you goin’?
“Columbus,” he said.
“You stationed there?”
Hayes felt cramped in the small Corvair. She was so large she spilled over her bucket seat, across the divide, onto the side of his seat. “No. I mean, yes. I’m reporting in tonight.”
“My boy went through basic there and what’s that thing you go to after basic?”
“AIT.”
“Yeah, advanced training, or something. He’s in Germany now. Who’d a thought my boy J.D.’d ever be over there in Europe? Hell, he’d never been out of Waycross before the Army. You ever been away from home?”
“Sure. Plenty of times,” he lied, not wanting to admit his lack of worldliness. “But I don’t know where I’ll be going after basic.”
“Your momma gonna miss you?”
Scotty was uncomfortable with the woman, not sure what she had in mind. He felt like she was pumping him to tell her more about himself than he wanted to. He tried to recall what he’d packed in case he had to bail out and leave his bag in the trunk. “My mom died when I was a kid.”
“Oh, I’m sorry, honey,” she looked over at Scotty.
Her eyes seemed sincere. He guessed she was really just a mom herself giving a kid a ride. He relaxed a bit.
“What ya’ want to do in the Army?”
“Don’t know. It really wasn’t my idea.”
“Drafted?”
“Yeah. But it would have happened sooner or later anyway. Just about everyone from my graduating class seems to be getting draft notices.”
“Maybe you can learn a trade.”
“Like what?”
“My boy’s in the Signal Corps now. He puts in phones and stuff. Seems to me he could do the same thing when he gets out if he was a mind to.”
He hadn’t thought about being a student again. “I’ll just be happy to get through basic without killing myself.”
“Oh, you’ll be okay, baby. Think of all the boys who’ve gone through basic. Why would you be any different?”
He thought about how many times he had failed—at school and a couple of jobs. He hoped this time would be different.
It began to rain.
“My name is Asa Russell. We’re going to spend the next two months together. And you’re not going to like me. I won’t lose any sleep over that,” the tall Negro sergeant said, his hands on his hips standing squarely in front of the assembled ranks of new recruits.
Scotty was relieved the sergeant’s eyes quickly sought out another recruit at the opposite end of the ten-man file to hassle. He tried to blend in and dodge some of the hazing and yelling going on all around him from several cadre NCOs. He had come close to being the object of Sergeant Russell’s attention twice in the last hour as they ran from building to building filling out forms, drawing equipment, signing for weapons and getting assigned to squads. Each time, just before Russell pounced on him for some minor infraction or failure to follow instructions, another soldier committed an even greater sin drawing the sergeant’s attention and his wrath.
Scotty didn’t know much about the Army, but he knew a few things about Russell from few glimpses he had stolen. Russell outranked the other sergeants by a simple count of the large yellow stripes on his shirtsleeves. And he must have been a parachutist because he wore bright, shiny black paratrooper boots like his father had worn. But mostly he had eyes like a bird of prey. He didn’t miss a move, a twitch or a mistake committed by one of the recruits.
The best possible way to avoid becoming Russell’s object of ridicule was by not getting noticed. Which was what Scotty was trying to do. He knew he had to work on lowering his profile, except he stumbled, fell onto the asphalt and spilled his armload of bedding in front of him. The other recruits kept running in formation, none of them willing or able to stop to help Scotty Hayes spread-eagled on the parking lot outside the company supply room.
“What the hell is your problem?” Sergeant Russell yelled, leaning over Scotty, his hands on his hips, chin jutted out.
Scotty looked up at the face only inches from his own. “I, uh. I just tripped.”
“Tripped? You tripped?” The sergeant pointed back at the building. “What the hell’s so hard about double-timing from the door to the barracks across the street? Are you some kind of fucking spastic, boy?”
Scotty felt a sudden flush of panic in his chest as his heart pounded and he checked the urge to jump up and run. “I’m sorry.”
“‘Sorry?’ You’re sorry as hell. You’re the sorriest piece of shit I have in this platoon, boy.” The sergeant looked up at the others and yelled, “We can all get some sleep sometime tonight if this young lady here can get off her ass and get with her platoon.”
Embarrassed and angry with himself for getting singled out, Scotty propelled to his feet. He scooped up the rolled mattress, sheets, pillow, mattress cover and blankets from the street and stared through the sergeant.
“You gonna’ be a wiseass now, son?”
“I’m not your son,” Scotty blurted out. As soon as the words left his lips, he knew he’d made a mistake. He knew he’d pay for it. He hadn’t meant to confront the man. He was confused, out of his element and completely rattled by it all.
“We’ll see just whose son you are, boy. I’ll deal with you later. Now, fall in with the others and quit holdin’ all of us up. Move!”
Scotty ran and stumbled to catch up with the others in the formation. But he couldn’t miss the look of disdain on the faces of the others. He could not avoid hearing the grumbling. From within the ranks, a voice said something about Hayes causing trouble for them all.
Even though it was nearly two in the morning, the World War II barracks was still abuzz. The forty new recruits were making bunks, shining boots, folding newly issued clothing and stuffing everything into cramped lockers while all talking at once.
The door at the end of the platoon bay opened with a bang, and Sergeant Russell stepped onto the waxed linoleum. Scotty saw him before he had even cleared the doorway.
“Where’s Mister Stumble Dick?” Russell yelled.
With Russell’s arrival, everything stopped. And except for the sounds of Russell’s voice and his combat boots on the floor, it was suddenly silent. There was no doubt, he was looking for Hayes.
Scotty stood up and stared at the blank wall across the center aisle of the platoon bay—not at Russell, unsure of how to calm his situation.
“You don’t answer when an NCO is looking for you, asshole?”
Still staring at the wall, not looking at Russell, Scotty said nothing thinking it would be better to play dumb than to antagonize the sergeant.
Russell walked into Hayes’ line of sight and got nose to nose with him. “You know, boy, every new cycle of trainees has one problem child in it just like you. And every time I have to square his ass away. You see, it’s my job to handle these little episodes where dickheads like you just don’t get it. And I have to make sure you understand who runs things around here and how this man’s army works.”
Hayes broke his stare and looked Russell in the eyes. He tried to send some kind of signal he was listening and not trying to piss the sergeant off, but it wasn’t working.
“What? You want to tell me something? You feelin’ froggy? ’Cause if you are you can go ahead and jump now. And I’ll put you on your ass so fast you’ll wonder if it was a truck or a bolt of lightning. You got me?”
Hayes unsure of what Russell expected of him, didn’t answer. He felt his face begin to flush.
Russell got closer, his nose two inches from Scotty’s and deliberately raised his voice, “You got me?!”
Still unsure, Scotty tried to think of an appropriate reply.
Before he could pick one, Russell started in on him again. “Looks to me like you need some extra training, boy.” He turned and grabbed a rifle from one of the arms racks straddling the centerline of the aisle between the rows of double bunks and threw it at Hayes.
Hayes saw it coming out of the corner of his eye and awkwardly caught it. Unsure of what to do with it, he waited for Russell to make the next move. Sweat formed at his neck and trickled down his back between his shoulder blades. His breathing became labored as his chest tightened. He was getting rattled. More rattled than he’d ever been.
Russell grabbed the collar on Hayes’ fatigue shirt and pulled him to one of the windows. He tapped the glass and pointed out at a grassy field next to the barracks. “See that?”
Before Hayes could reply, Russell continued. “That’s a parade field. It is one point seven three miles around it. Most days you’ll use it for physical training, and you’ll get plenty. But you’re getting a head start tonight, boy. I want you to go out there and find the beaten path that runs ’round the whole field and start double-timing around it with your rifle held over your head. You got it? Double-timing, that’s running for a dumb-ass civilian like you.”
“For how long?” Hayes asked.
“‘For how long?’” Russell mocked Hayes’ nerve for even asking. “Until I get tired. That’s how goddamn long.”
Sweat poured down Scotty’s face from under his helmet and burned his eyes. His new boots rubbed blisters in several places on his feet, and his arms felt as though they were made of wet sand.
He regretted having started smoking before leaving Belton. His lungs burned, and he was exhausted from lack of sleep. Rage, confusion and something resembling depression boiled up inside him as he staggered along the worn path, holding the eight-pound M-1 rifle over his head.
His pain wasn’t anything like he’d experienced in football or track. The sensation wasn’t like the pain from a muscle pull or a sprain. It was bone deep in his feet, shoulders and his knees. In school, he could bounce back in minutes. But in the hours since starting Basic Training, pain seemed to stack up on pain. Even the joints in his hands were stiff with swelling and becoming tender. It didn’t feel like pain from training alone. It felt like it was deliberate. To punish him.
His skin was on fire in several places where his sweat soaked fatigues constantly rubbed into his neck, ankles, crotch and waistline. His eyes burned from sweat running down his face during the unending hours of two days of crawling, running and pushups.
What had he done to cause Russell to single him out? Why was he suddenly the pariah of his platoon? Everyone in his platoon looked at him like he was wrong, not the sergeant. He knew Russell owned him for the next eight weeks and could make his life even more miserable for him. Scotty knew for sure he had to get out of Russell’s gun sights. And it wasn’t going to be anything like pacifying his former high school vice principal.
As Scotty continued to struggle around the parade field’s beaten path he caught sight of Sergeant Russell standing on the porch of his barracks, arms crossed, watching. From somewhere deep he summoned up the strength. He stiffened his arms to support the rifle and raised his head. He found the reserve to pick up his pace and steady his gait as he ran on into the dark Georgia night. He might drop; he might die out there, but he wouldn’t quit.
In the dark of the platoon bay, all he could make out was the deep shadows hugging the corners of the cavities between the floor beams holding up the second floor. The recesses were unlit by the promise of dawn soon to spill through the rows of windows running along the long walls of the open platoon bay.
Unable to quickly fall sleep, Scotty stared up at the exposed joists just over arm’s length from his upper bunk. How many others had slept in the same bunk and how many of them stared at the very same beams.
He wondered if anyone else in his platoon was suffering as much as he was. And with each day they seemed more and more like strangers than comrades in arms.
Fatigue tugged at him and his problem with Russell dogging him and singling him out for ridicule weighed down his mood and begged for a solution. He had never been so exhausted or felt so alone. In the middle of a room filled with almost two dozen other soldiers, he felt like an outsider.
Gone was the support he counted on from high school classmates when he was singled out by teachers. Gone was the chance to talk his way out of trouble with a smile and a promise. The others were getting along okay, and he seemed to be the only one Russell just wouldn’t let up on.
He tried to laugh it off in front of the others when Russell wasn’t around, but it didn’t work. He tried to solicit sympathy and got no response. He even tried a few handy excuses. Nothing was working for him. None of his well-honed skills at getting out of work or excuses for not being prepared from his high school days worked in G Company, 1st Battalion, 2nd Training Regiment.
Scotty was coming to realize his two problems, Russell and the platoon, were going to continue for the rest of basic training—almost two more months. He didn’t know if he could take it for much longer. And he couldn’t see any way to appease Russell or divert his attention to allow Scotty to quietly slip back into the obscurity of just being one of the trainees in the platoon. He was certainly Russell’s pet project. And it made no difference whether Scotty was screwing up or doing okay, Russell watched his every move, stayed on his back and made his life miserable.
Problem solving wasn’t one of Scotty’s talents. His whole life had been ad hoc, on the fly and without deliberate actions on his part. He’d never been a planner or even a plotter; never worried about trying to get out ahead of problems. He’d always been able to disappear into the crowd, but he no longer enjoyed the luxury, and it frightened him. He had to come up with something. But what?
While everyone else was sleeping, Scotty had been cleaning the latrine. Punishment for something he had done earlier in the day. He’d even forgotten what it was. What looked like an hour’s job turned into four, and he didn’t finish until nearly three a.m.
He was so drained he couldn’t find the strength to take off his boots or uniform before climbing into his rack to steal some sack time before the next training day officially started. For him, the days were beginning to feel as if they were all braided together into one long, unending ordeal dedicated to breaking him.
He tried to get comfortable atop a three-inch mattress supported by a wire mesh grid looking more like garden fencing than bedsprings. He still hadn’t adjusted to sleeping less than five feet from overhead beams layered with many coats of paint. He knew he wasn’t going to get completely comfortable, so he settled for what he could get.
He thought of home and Kitty. He couldn’t even quit. There he was in Georgia—on his own and missing Belton and even high school. And another day of it was about to start all over again. He felt the pressure to hurry up and get some rest because it was just minutes before the platoon would have to fall out of the barracks for the morning’s scheduled run and physical training. And he had no plan.
“Hayes,” an angry voice whispered from above his head, behind Scotty’s bunk.
Drifting, Scotty wasn’t even sure if he heard his name being called or if he dreamed it.
“Hayes!” He heard it again and started to get up on one elbow to look around in the darkened platoon bay when the voice cautioned, “Don’t move. Just keep looking at the ceiling, asshole. Don’t even think about looking back at me.”
Unsure of whose voice it was or if there was a threat attached to the whispered words, Scotty tried to decide what to do. He opted to lie still and listen.
“We’re already tired of you being a fuck-up, Hayes.”
“Who’s we?” Scotty asked, now sure it was another trainee.
“Don’t be cute—the whole goddamn platoon. We don’t want Sergeant Russell or any of the other cadre on our asses because of you. You’re making us look bad, and we’re tellin’ you if you don’t shape up we’re going to kick your ass. All of us.
“Every time you fuck up we end up getting shit for it. We’re tired of doing pushups because you screw up. We’re tired of being the last platoon in the chow line because we have to wait for Russell to quit tearing your ass up. We’re tired of being the last for Mail Call because of you and we’re tired of being thought of as a bunch of fuck-ups around the battalion because of you!”
Scotty could feel others standing near his bunk. They were all there. What could he do? Who could help? Russell. Maybe he could help. The same Russell who had been busting Scotty’s hump was the Russell he needed right then. No. Russell couldn’t really protect him from them. If they wanted to get him, they’d find a time and place. “You can’t —”
“Shut up. We’re gonna’ have a blanket party. You keep it up, and you’ll be the guest of honor.”
Scotty had heard about blanket parties coming through the Reception Station his first two days in the Army. They jump you, throw a blanket over your head so you can’t identify anyone and then pummel you.
He could feel his stomach tighten as he gripped the metal rails of his bunk and tried to calm his racing heartbeat.
“We’ll just tell the NCOs you tripped and fell on the stairs comin’ down from the second floor. And you know they’ll buy it because they’re fucking sick of your sorry-ass attitude too.