How to Be Parisian: Wherever You Are

Cover
Title Page
About the Book
A Note About the Authors
Epigraph
Introduction
1. Get the Basics
1. Aphorisms
2. The Parisienne as Seen by a Parisian Man
3. What You Won’t Find in Her Closet
4. The Most Famous Parisiennes are Foreigners
5. 1:00 P.M.: First Date at the Café de Flore
6. A Serious Text About Humour
7. Parisian Puzzle—Winter/Summer
8. A Kind of Blue
9. A Mother with Flaws
10. How to Answer the Telephone When He Finally Calls
11. Virtues of the Signature Item
12. Au Naturel
13. Public Privacy
14. Faux Pas
15. Safety Kit: Because You Never Know
16. Scenes from Parisian Life: Take 1
2. Own Your Bad Habits
1. Yes. But No. But Yes.
2. How to Make Him Think You Have a Lover
3. Her Own Highway Code
4. Kiss and Play
5. Hosting a Dinner Party: Behind the Scenes
6. Cool or Cold?
7. Where Does This Pout Come From?
8. Parisian Snobbisms
9. An Off Day at Work
10. Hard to Admit
11. Not Your Most Glorious Moments
12. How To Destabilize a Man
13. The 6:00 P.M. Debate: The Gym
14. Scenes from Parisian Life: Take 2
3. Cultivate Your Allure
1. 24-Hour Look
2. The Essentials
3. Less is More
4. On a Parisienne’s Bookshelf
5. The Miniskirt
6. Save Your Skin
7. When You Can Have Anything
8. Women in Black
9. Off the Radar
10. Navy Blue
11. The Parisienne as Seen by an American Novelist
12. The Simones
13. In the Countryside
14. The Best Version of Yourself
15. Take Your Time
16. Trinkets and Treasures
17. Scenes from Parisian Life: Take 3
4. Dare to Love
1. The Ideal Man
2. An Optimistic View on Love
3. A Woman’s Real Assets
4. In Love with Love
5. A Mother’s Advice on Love
6. A Little Extra Something
7. The Party
8. After-Sex Lunch – Happy Ending
9. Being Naked
10. Girls Gang
11. The One Who Got Away
12. Not a Wedding
13. Separate Bedrooms
14. Scenes from Parisian Life: Take 4
5. Parisian Tips
1. Spending Time the Parisian Way
2. Paris Cutouts
3. The ABC’s of Cheating
4. The Art of Make-Believe
5. Classic (and Foolproof) French Recipes
6. Setting the Table
7. On Your Mantelpiece
8. You’ll Be a Man, My Son
9. Lighten Up
10. Playdate
11. Little Big Treats
12. Sunday Recipes
13. Ancestral Tips (We Never Forget Our Roots)
14. When You Watch These Films, You’re in Paris
15. Scenes from Parisian Life: Take 5
What We Have in Common
Fifteen Words You Need
Address Book
Acknowledgements
Illustration Credits
Copyright

INTRODUCTION

The truth is out: Parisiennes aren’t privy to a secret “skinny” gene, they aren’t always easy to be with and aren’t all perfect mothers. In fact, they are very imperfect, vague, unreliable and full of paradoxes. But they can also be funny, attentive, curious and ironic, and they know how to enjoy life.

We are four Parisian women who have been friends for ages. We are very different in many ways but always agree about the important things. We’ve spent countless long nights laughing with each other and sharing that typically French enthusiasm for transforming life into fiction. As you’ll discover, Parisian women spend an inordinate amount of energy trying to spin every episode of their existence into a very good story.

Our aim here is to give you an insight into the quintessentially Parisian art of being a woman. We’re methodical and yet shambolic, proud and yet self-deprecating, loyal and yet unfaithful. We’ll point out our attitude, nonchalance, our low-key style, what we are like in love and how we choose to spend our days and nights. We hope that the following pages will dispel the mystery.

Illustration Credits

Arthur Miller, Simone Signoret, Marilyn Monroe, Yves Montand © John Bryson/Sygma/Corbis

About the Book

At last, a fun and spirited take on what it really means to be a Parisienne in the 21st Century.

Anne Berest, Audrey Diwan, Caroline de Maigret and Sophie Mas – talented iconoclasts and friends for years – give their very original views on style, culture, attitude and men alongside making fun of their complicated, often contradictory, feelings and behaviour. They admit to being snobs, unpredictable but not unreliable, bossy and opinionated yet tender and romantic.

These modern Parisiennes will take you on a first date, to a party and through a hangover. They will tell you how to be mysterious and sensual, make your boyfriend jealous, the right way to approach weddings and the gym, and they will share their address book in Paris for where to go at the end of the night, for a birthday, for a smart date, for vintage finds and much more.

Chic and desirable, How To Be Parisian Wherever You Are will make you laugh as you tap into your inner cool.

A Note About the Authors

ANNE BEREST is the author of two novels and a biography of Françoise Sagan published this year; she also writes for television, film and theatre.

CAROLINE DE MAIGRET studied literature at the Sorbonne before moving to New York to model. She returned to Paris in 2006 to found her music label. De Maigret has been an ambassador for Chanel since 2012 and supports women worldwide through the NGO CARE.

SOPHIE MAS was born and raised in Paris. After graduating from Sciences Po and HEC, she started her own film company and now works as a producer in Los Angeles, New York and São Paulo.

AUDREY DIWAN became a scriptwriter after studying journalism and political science. She wrote the screenplay for Cédric Jimenez’s La French, with Jean Dujardin, and is now directing her first feature film; she is also editor-at-large for the magazine Stylist.

Acknowledgements

Thanks to Christian Bragg, Dimitri Coste, Olivier Garros, Karl Lagerfeld, Johan Lindeberg for BLK DNM, Raphaël Lugassy, Stéphane Manel, Jean-Baptiste Mondino, Sara Nataf, Yarol Poupaud, So-Me and Annemarieke Van Drimmelen for generously sharing their work with us, as well as Susanna Lea, Shelley Wanger, Naja Baldwin, Françoise Gavalda and Pei Loi Koay.

Also: Claire Berest, the Berest family, Diene Berete, Bastien Bernini, Fatou Biramah, Paul-Henry Bizon, Odara Carvalho, Carole Chŕetiennot (Le Café de Flore), Jeanne Damas, Julien Delajoux, Charlotte Delarue, Emmanuel Delavenne (Hôtel Amour), Emmanuelle Ducournau, Clémentine Goldszal, Camille Gorin, Sébastien Haas, Guillaume Halard, Mark Holgate, Cédric Jimenez, Gina Jimenez, Tina Ka, Nina Klein, Bertrand de Langeron, Magdalena Lawniczak, Françoise Lehmann, Pierre Le Ny, Téa and Peter Lundell, Saif Mahdhi, the Maigret family, Gaëlle Mancina, Stéphane Manel, Tessa Manel, Jules Mas, Martine Mas, the Mas family, Jean-Philippe Moreaux, Roxana Nadim, Chloé Nataf, Fatou N’Diaye, Anne Sophie Nerrant, Nicolas Nerrant, Next Management Team, Priscille d’Orgeval, Eric Pfrunder, Anton Poupaud, Yarol Poupaud, Charlotte Poutrelle, Elsa Rakotoson, Gérard Rambert, Joachim Roncin, Christian de Rosnay, Xavier de Rosnay, Martine Saada, Colombe Schneck, Victor Saint Macary, Juliette Seydoux, Sonia Sieff, David Souffan, Samantha Taylor Pickett, Pascal Teixeira, Rodrigo Teixeira, Hervé Temime, Thomsen Paris, Anna Tordjman, Emilie Urbansky, Virginie Viard, Jean Vedreine (Le Mansart), Camille Vizzavona, Aude Walker, Mathilde Warnier, Adèle Wismes, Rebecca Zlotowski.

WHAT WE HAVE IN COMMON

adieu * à la carte * à la mode * à propos * Art Deco * au naturel * avant-garde * bon appétit * bourgeois * brunette * carte blanche * c’est la vie * chaud-froid * cherchez la femme * chic * cliché * coquette * coup de foudre * crème brûlée * crème de la crème * cuisine * cul de sac * debutante * décolleté * encore * ennui * faux pas * femme fatale * fiancé/fiancée * film noir * foie gras * haute couture * hors d’oeuvre * je ne sais quoi * joie de vivre * lingerie * Mardi Gras * ménage à trois * negligee * nouvelle vague * Oh la la! * papier-mâché * petite * prêt-à-porter * protégée * raison d’être * rendezvous * RSVP * sabotage * sangfroid * sans * savoir faire * savoir-vivre * souvenir * tête-à-tête * touché * tour de force * trompe l’oeil * vis-à-vis * voilà * Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir? * zut alors

aftershave * babysitter * best seller * blackout * boom * boss * brainstorming * break * briefing * business * camping * casting * checkup * chewing gum * clash * coach * comeback * cool * crash * design * discount * dry martini * duty-free * escalator * fair play * fast food * has-been * hobby * holdup * in/out * interview * kidnapping * leader * lifting * lobby * look * must-have * nerd * nonstop * one-man show * overbooking * overdose * pacemaker * package * parking * penalty * planning * pole position * pool * punk * puzzle * racket * remake * rock * royalties * rush * scoop * self-control * sexy * shopping * show * skateboard * skinhead * sponsor * stress * striptease * talk show * timing * underground * weekend

Fifteen Words You Need

Parisians (and, more generally, the French) are keen lovers of what might at first glance appear to be very disgusting delicacies. Food that resembles things that we shall refrain from naming here, out of respect for common decency. The andouillette is a perfect example: made from a pig’s digestive tract, which constitutes the andouillette’s skin, it resembles a big fat sausage. It is a mix of veal and pork, seasoned with spices and wine. A delectable dish, you’ll often find it preceded by the label “AAAAA,” which stands for Association Amicale des Amateurs d’Andouillette Authentique (Friendly Association of Lovers of Authentic Andouillette). Dig in, mouth open wide (but eyes shut tight) – you won’t regret it.

The French do la bise when saying hello and good-bye. That is to say they kiss, but not just any which way. To properly do la bise, both parties lean in so that only their cheeks graze, while making a kissing sound with their mouths; then this is repeated on the other side. Depending on where you are in France, the number of these kisses may vary. Whereas people in the South of France give four kisses, the Bretons stop at three. In Paris, you never do more than two. Note: one should never attempt to hug a Parisian. La bise may bring faces together, but bodies must stay apart.

The Parisienne doesn’t keep a diary nor does she confide her innermost thoughts to an imaginary friend. Someone always ends up reading your diary and that someone is often the person you’d most likely want to keep it hidden from. However, every Parisienne has a notebook in her bag, preferably a black Moleskine, in which she’s constantly jotting down all sorts of things. Thoughts that cross her mind, a quote from a book that she liked, a to-do list, her favourite words, the lyrics of a song she wants to look up, the mobile number of the guy she just met at a café, the previous night’s dream that suddenly came back to her …

It’s a cliché but it’s true: all Parisians eat cheese. Whatever the time of day. Some like to start the morning with a piece of Gruyère, some enjoy a slice of toast topped with goat cheese as a mid-afternoon snack, while others consider Camembert with a glass of red wine as the perfect nightcap after an evening out at a club. But beware: cheese, especially Camembert, is an art of its own. It’s best to buy cheese from a cheese shop. But this is what even the biggest Parisian snobs will do: they’ll buy all their cheese at the best cheese shop in Paris, except for the Camembert, which they’ll buy at the supermarket. Preferably the Lepetit brand. Camembert has to be eaten runny, with the creamy heart oozing out of the rind. If not: don’t even consider it.