Then Mommy called me inside and said I must get ready for the party. I had been so busy riding my bike, I had forgotten about the time and was getting hungry. We ate breakfast and after that we packed the car with all the things we needed for my party. I had invited all my friends to a Zoo Farm, which was close to our house, everybody had replied to say they were coming. I was popular and loved having parties. We patted our dogs and cats goodbye and drove to the zoo farm.

While waiting for everyone to arrive, we walked around looking at some of the animals in the Zoo. Very soon all my friends had arrived, they must have been just as excited as I was. 

There was a lot to do there. We rode on ponies and played with the bunnies, fed the horses and wandered around the birdcages, imitating them. There were many animals and we walked around for ages looking at them. I received lots of presents, I was Barbie mad and got a lot of new Barbies and clothes from my friends. I was looking forward to playing with them all. It was so much fun! My whole family was there, all my aunts, uncles and cousins. My cousin gave me a pretty swimming costume, it was red and blue with butterflies on it. Mommy told me to try it on to see that it fitted properly, and I ran to the bathrooms nearby. I was in a hurry because it was very hot and all my friends were waiting for me. They had already changed into their costumes because we were going to run and jump through the sprinklers to cool down. I grabbed my best friend Roxy’s hand, eager to try it on, and we both sprinted to the changing rooms. 

When I came out of the change rooms, Mommy immediately noticed the lump on my leg. It was the size of a tennis ball. I could not believe how big it had grown. Even my aunt noticed it and asked me what it was. I was not really bothered about it. My new costume fitted perfectly and I ran to join my friends.

A little later Mommy called us, the food was ready. 

Hotdogs! My favourite, yummy! We all sat around the big wooden tables, some of my friends were sitting on blankets under the trees. After we had eaten we wandered around the zoo farm again. They had white lions in the cages at the top of the farm. I loved lions and really wanted to see them. We all walked there and when we got back Mommy had put my birthday cake in the middle of the table. Everybody gathered around the table and Mommy lit the candles. I blew them out and then everybody sang “Happy Birthday” to me. Everybody was given a piece of cake and we sat under the trees and ate until our tummies were full. I did not want my party to end. Everybody had a lot of fun and at the end of the day I was sad to say goodbye to my friends. I wanted every day to be like that day.

That night I was very tired and went to bed early. Mommy came to kiss me goodnight. She was still worried about the lump on my leg and how big it had suddenly grown. She told me that she would take me to see Dr Nick the next day. I was not worried, I liked him. He laughed and joked and always gave me a sucker.

“But Mommy, I can’t go tomorrow,” I suddenly remembered. “Our class is going to the play park tomorrow.” The previous week we had a competition at school to see who could raise the most money, I was so excited when my class won. We were going to be rewarded by going to a play park nearby. 

“What time are you going there?”

 “I don’t know and I really don’t want to miss it. Please can’t we go to Dr Nick some other time? Please Mommy!” I begged. 

“Well let’s see how your lump is in the morning. If it’s smaller, you can go to school.” She said as she kissed me goodnight and switched off the light.

The next morning, the lump was still there. I begged Mommy again, she agreed to let me go to the play park for a short time then she would come and fetch me and take me to Dr Nick. This lump really had her worried. I was very excited about going to the play park and quickly got ready for school. 

When we got to school, the school bus was waiting for us. My teacher called us all and we lined up to get into the bus. We were allowed to wear civvies (civilian clothes) and on the way to the play park, we sang songs. The morning went by quickly and I was having a lot of fun with my friends when Mommy came to fetch me. 

On the way to the doctor’s rooms I chatted to Mommy about my fun morning. While we waited to see Dr Nick, Mommy and I paged through a magazine. Soon we were called into his room. Mommy told him about the lump and he had a look at it. He spoke to me and told me that I needed to go to the hospital for a thing he called a ‘Sonar Scan’. He wrote out a letter, which Mommy had to take to the hospital. He told Mommy to come back to see him straight after the scan.

On the way to the hospital, Mommy and I chatted about all the presents I got the day before and how much fun my birthday party was. When we got to the hospital, Mommy reminded me that this was the hospital I was born in.

A nurse came and called us into the scanning room. Mommy gave her the letter from Dr Nick. The nurse put cold jelly on my leg and used an even colder machine to scan my lump. I could see the picture on the computer screen next to us. The doctor in charge looked very worried and did not say anything to Mommy. He called in four other doctors who crowded around the screen and pointed at something, quietly discussing what they saw. They still did not say anything at all and walked out of the room. The first doctor stayed behind and spoke quietly to Mommy. He told her that the lump was not normal, but suggested that we go for more tests to confirm what it was. 

Mommy looked scared and asked him what he thought it was. He said he wasn’t sure but said it might be cancerous. He said we must take the results back to Dr Nick. I remember seeing Mommy go white, with big tears in her eyes. The doctor told Mommy to sit down because she was feeling dizzy and was going to faint. 

I did not understand why they were looking so sad and kept bugging Mommy to tell me. She told me that she would explain to me when we got into the car. When we walked out of the scanning room, the receptionist asked Mommy if she was going to be okay. Mommy just nodded, with tears streaming down her face.

As soon as we got in the car, I asked Mommy what was going on. She was crying so much she could hardly talk and told me that the doctor thought I might have cancer. I didn’t know what that was and asked her. She said it was a very, very serious disease. I also started to cry a bit, but told her that I would be okay and that she mustn’t cry so much. I hated seeing Mommy cry, she never cried unless it was really bad.

On the way back to the Dr Nick’s rooms, Mommy phoned Daddy and told him what had happened and that he must meet us there. When we arrived, Daddy was already there, also looking very worried. I had never seen Daddy scared before, in my eyes he was always so brave with everything. It was getting late and we were the last patients to see him. He called us into his consulting room and asked for the scan results. He read them carefully. I had never seen him look so sad. Dr Nick was always very happy. 

This must be serious but I still did not understand what they were talking about. He told my mom and dad to take me to the Johannesburg General Hospital, the place where my sister, Michelle was born. He said that they had to do more tests and told Mommy to let him know what the results were. 

Mom asked him what he thought it was and he also said a cancerous tumour, which made both Mommy and Daddy cry a lot. He gave my mom a letter to take to the Joburg Gen. When we got home, nobody said much. Michelle wanted to know what had happened. After Mommy and Daddy had told her, she also looked worried. I tried to cheer everybody up and told them about the play park. I was looking forward to going back to school and finding out what my friends had done after I had left, but I was worried, seeing everyone was so quiet.

The next day I missed school again. I had to go to the Joburg Gen with Mommy. I had never been in that hospital. It was huge and we got lost. 

Eventually we found the Children’s Department, where there were hundreds of kids all waiting to see a doctor. Mommy went to a nurse, showed her the letter and asked her if we were in the right place. The nurse told her that we had to go to the Oncology Ward on the ninth floor. 

While we walked towards the lifts, I asked Mommy what ‘Oncology Ward’ meant and she told me it was the cancer ward. I still was not sure what cancer was.

As we got out the lift, Mommy got a phone call from Dr Nick. He wanted to know if we were at the hospital and if we were okay. Mommy told him that we were on our way to the cancer ward. He told her to phone him and let him know what was going to happen. The hospital was so confusing and my mom asked another nurse how to get to the ninth floor because we were lost again. 

As we walked into the ward, there were two big creatures in the corner of the room, a big blue Sulley and little Mike from the movie Monsters Inc. The ward was full of toys and kids riding little scooters, building puzzles and reading books. It looked so different from the rest of the hospital, which was quite boring. We went to the reception desk and a nurse greeted us with a friendly smile. She introduced herself to us and spoke with a funny accent. She said her name was Sister Susan. She read the letter that Mommy gave her. Then she took us down the corridor and showed us the waiting room. There were many pictures on the walls and toys everywhere. A friendly lady came over and started chatting to me. She asked me my name and how old I was. Then she asked me if I wanted to build a puzzle. I loved puzzles and walked with her to a toy room. There were hundreds of puzzles, books, games and dolls. I chose a puzzle and sat down near Mommy. She chatted to Mommy and explained that she worked for CHOC (Children’s Haematology and Oncology Clinic) which was a group of people that would help me and my family get through my treatment.

After a while the doctor came and took us through to her consulting room. She was very friendly and joked with me. She asked Mommy what had happened. She read the letter from Dr Nick and then asked me to climb onto the bed. She checked my leg. The lump had grown a bit more and it still looked creepy. I was getting worried because it did not look like it was going away. She pushed on the lump, her hands were a bit cold. She told Mommy that they were going to do a test called a biopsy to see what the lump was. I was not listening to what they were saying and looked around the room. There were lots of pictures on the walls that other kids had painted. There were teddy bears and toys in her room as well. 

The doctor was busy telling Mommy that I was in the best possible place to be treated and that she would phone Dr Nick. She told Mommy that I had to come back in three days’ time for the biopsy to be done. 

I asked her how they did the biopsy, and she explained that they needed to cut out a small piece of my lump and test it, and then they would know what was wrong with me and how to treat it properly. She also explained that I would be off school for a while. Then we went back to the reception desk and made an appointment for three days’ time.

It all went dark…

Sister Susan was there and she told Mommy that I would be having an anaesthetic and that I must not eat or drink anything from 10p.m. the night before. She was very friendly and I liked her a lot. 

As we walked out of the ward, a kid walked in front of us pushing a drip. She had no hair and looked very sick. I wondered why she was bald. I had a lot of questions for Mommy. I looked at her but she was crying again so I decided to ask her later. 

On Wednesday I went back to school to tell my teacher what was happening to me. Mommy went to the staff room to find her but she was not there. She was in the Photostat room and Mommy told her what had happened. I went outside to find my friends. I didn’t know that this would be the last time I would see them for a very long time.