The Awakening of Mystical Consciousness©
Offering Words of Hope and Consolation in Times of Trauma
Published by Healing Dimensions, ACC
Printed by West Press
Tucson, Arizona
Copyright © 2006 by Brent M. Baum. All Rights Reserved. No portion of this book, except for brief reviews, may be reproduced, stored in retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means – electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the written permission of the publisher. This text is not intended as a substitute for appropriate medical or psychiatric care.
*All essential features, including names have been altered to respect and protect the confidentiality of clients.
Published by:
Healing Dimensions, A.C.C.
5675 North Camino Esplendora #6137
Tucson, Arizona 85718
Phone: (520) 615-9247
Web Site Address: www.healingdimensions.com
Also Visit: www.michaelsgift.org
Edited by Antoinette Kleinpeter and Linda Ladner
Cover Illustration and Design by Christy McMearty
Portrait Photograph by Philip Ramackers
Layout and Manufacture by West Press
Cover Production by West Press
Printed in the United States of America
Library of Congress Cataloguing-in-Publication
Baum, Brent M.
Living as light: the awakening of mystical consciousness
By Brent M. Baum, 1st ed.
p. cm.
Includes bibliographical references.
ISBN 978-0-9661990-6-2
Library of Congress Control Number (LCCN): 2006935495
1. Mysticism |
2. Spirituality |
3 Mind and Body |
4. Energy Psychology |
5. Consciousness |
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I. Title |
II. Author |
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Preface
Acknowledgments
Introduction
Chapter 1 The Invitation
Chapter 2 Visions and Dreams
Chapter 3 The Wake-Up Call
Chapter 4 From Solid to Light
Chapter 5 Our Source of Safety
Chapter 6 Becoming Translucent
Chapter 7 Manifesting Eden
Chapter 8 The Return to Innocence
Chapter 9 Reclaiming Our Bodies
Chapter 10 Lessons in Duality
Chapter 11 Coming Out of Trance
Chapter 12 Mystical Intimacy
Chapter 13 Reclaiming the Emotional Spectrum
Chapter 14 Opening to True Sight
Chapter 15 The Gateway to Power
Chapter 16 The Healer We Hold Within
Chapter 17 Tantra, Touch, and Healing
Chapter 18 The Body as Mirror
Chapter 19 Forgiveness and Healing
Chapter 20 The Science of Manifestation
Chapter 21 The Key to the Mysteries
Chapter 22 The New Healing Paradigm
Chapter 23 From Darkness to Light
Chapter 24 The Face of Eden
Notes
Bibliography
By Sharon Wegscheider-Cruse
Humility in the artist is his frank acceptance of all experiences, Just as Love in the artist is simply that sense of Beauty That reveals to the world its body and soul.
Oscar Wilde
The words “courageous, intuitive, holy, spirited, healing and wise” kept coming to me as I read Brent’s most recent book. It seemed as though I was on the journey of his life and his inspired learnings as he presented his truth through his journey inward. This journey he describes so well as “the only true safe place.” The excitement of this presentation is in the merging of the principles of science and spirituality. I felt drawn to the expanded ideas surrounding what it is to experience mystical intimacy, healing and the power of truly “letting go”.
Brent takes us on his lifetime quest through his exploration in archeology and the connections we have with each other on a very cellular level. He helps us build bridges to those who have gone before us. We learn about how we store our memory through the trance experience and how trauma becomes part of who we are. Then he helps the reader to understand how and why we need to take the necessary steps to heal that trauma.
Early in my career, I learned from another powerful healer. Her name was Olga Worrall. Olga and her husband Ambrose were introduced to me by one of my early mentors, Virginia Satir. She took me to Baltimore to meet the Worralls and both she and I experienced a healing with Olga. She was a renowned mystic who practiced her healing mission in a very simple manner - the laying on of her hands.
When I met Brent, I found that he, too, is a healer and a mystic with an incredible ability to verbalize and explain the lessons he is so able to teach. I have personally experienced his healing power. His life story is told in rich and fine detail in this book; he shares his simple and profound truth. His book informs us of the value of visual imagery, the dangers of auditory over-stimulation, explains the dangers of terrorism, and the culture’s fascination with reality television shows. Then he is able to take us to the healing we can find by the empowerment of ourselves and others. He helps us to find balance by understanding karma and how to resolve our own healing. He inspires us by helping us find our own ability to become a visionary. His book is a wake-up call to our own development.
This past year, I had an experience of sharing with a dear friend who had lost a loved one in a senseless traffic accident. I remember telling her that you do not get over a death – you survive and get through a death. I related to Brent when he says – we do not get over trauma, we get through trauma. Brent says, “Trauma is often a wake-up call. It helps us move from complacency and apathy to opportunity and change.”
Scientists who investigated Olga Worrall’s powers were left awed by them. Brent as well goes beyond the level of scientific explanation. He challenges our belief systems, our old perceptions and earlier standards of healing. All those who work with others can profit by his teachings.
In working with others, we must each “clear our energy field”. We must finish our unfinished business. Then we will find our own light, our own power and our own ability to become a healer. Brent takes the mystery of that possibility and shows us how to tap into our own abilities to heal.
An important part of his message is that each of us can become priestly, can find our true light and can be with someone else in their search for their own power and spirituality. Abundance is available to each of us. This book is eye opening and directs each of us to a shift of consciousness. Some of the most courageous and revealing questions and answers that the book raises are around the subjects of sexuality, religious addiction, gay marriage, celibacy, co-dependency, trauma, healing and hope. The information provided is groundbreaking and clear.
It is inspiring to learn about the powers of our fantasy, our daydreaming, and our times in meditation and prayer. This book is very important to those in medical systems, educational systems, religious systems and the addiction treatment system. It is an awakening.
There is a new vision that can promote and encourage integrative medicine, holistic healing, greater inner wisdom, more complete health, a time of abundance and success in the way we live. Brent’s book can bring us that vision.
Sharon Wegscheider-Cruse, MA
Author, Trainer, Healer and Family Therapist
Though it may seem strange, my first word of thanks goes to trauma! Without its lessons and challenges I would not be anywhere near as passionate as I am about my “mission.” Along with this, I must thank you, my teachers, particularly those of you who appeared as clients and who found the courage to face your own traumas and make the journey within to find solutions. The truth of this was revealed when I realized that nearly all of the truly life-changing career opportunities I have had occurred through the intervention of you who practice Twelve Step programs and, who, from your own wisdom and experience, glimpsed the potential of this work when I was only marginally aware. If not for the pioneering work of Sharon Wegscheider-Cruse, I doubt that I would have been as inspired to move into the field of counseling and psychotherapy. Under the promptings of Nancy Meyer and Don Lavender, I began my own paradigm shift. A special word of gratitude I offer to Wyatt Webb who intervened to bring me to Miraval – a tremendous spiritual springboard for connecting with so many resources for healing.
Among those on my indomitable support team, I want to thank Antoinette Kleinpeter, Kenny Kleinpeter, Linda Ladner, Steve Potocki, Jeanette Arnold, Audrey Kirk, Gennie Landry, Diana Cronan, Jason Henderson, Roberta Guillory, Vicki Bentley, Rosemary Vaughn, Yvonne Hedeker, Madelon Mitchum, Fran and Ray Lemkul, Jayne Weingart, Ellen Katz, Tim Frank, Beverly Sincavage, Lila Cherri, Sharron Raymond, Dawn Whiting, Karen Restivo, Maya and Tom Sharp, Deborah Titus, Kristen Trahan, Suzanne Honda, Marcia Howton, Chris Oehrle, Soram Khalsa, Mariko Tanaka, Ronnie and Betty Falgout, the “Lightbearers” Healing Group, “Angel” Gail Konz, Gladys Strohme, Reed Brown, and many others. Among the institutions, organizations, and communities that have supported me are the administration and staff of Cottonwood Treatment Centers, the Miraval staff, Unity Christ Church of Gaithersburg, Maryland, Nancy Marder and the Infinity Foundation in Chicago, Arden Shore Children and Family Services, the Cenacle Retreat Centers, Sr. Joan and St. Mary of the Pines Retreat Center, and all of the other spiritual communities that have hosted me and supported the dissemination of this message of healing. To the archaeology community that inspired my passion to unearth the past, I offer my heartfelt gratitude: Uncle Mel, Joe Seger, Paul Jacobs and the Lahav Research Project. I wish to express a special word of thanks to my parents and brother who continue to guide me in spirit, and my sisters Peggy, Margie, and Carole who have been unceasing in their encouragement and support over the years. To the medical team in spirit who are ever present and effective in ways that I will probably never fully understand, I offer my heartfelt gratitude. May this momentum of love and support touch every heart seeking comfort and guidance on the via negativa and the path to mystical awakening.
I offer you this work as an introduction to a new way of being in the world. In the clearing and healing of the bodymind, a new way of knowing and perceiving self emerges. This changes our manner of perception from a static, trauma-based frame of reference, to one that is dynamic and flowing – a non-threatening mode of embracing all experience as an invitation to master our perception. This new way of perceiving self is “light-based.” In coming to know ourselves as dynamic fields of light at play in a universe of images, our focus is able to change. The ability to focus is directly related to our ability to create, and for this very reason, the reclamation of our power to focus is of revolutionary importance – just how revolutionary you will see in the pages that follow. The truth of the matter is that we have been “in trance” for at least 1.5 million years on this planet – before we were even verbal! These static states of consciousness induced by trauma added a density to our self-definition that left us trapped in physicality and materiality. This protective encoding began with the occurrence of our earliest stages of evolution and the traumas that accompanied them. Over time, the weight and burden that we accumulated was incorporated into the bodymind and our belief systems. Eventually we were no longer able to distinguish between our true nature and the perceptions imposed by trauma. Our self-understanding was profoundly shaped by this accumulating static and eventually supplanted our luminosity with its own binding and restrictive physics. In the advent of our new findings about our universe, quantum physics, and the power that we possess to alter our states of consciousness, we are emerging from our 1.5 million year old trance and coming into our power. The ability to reclaim our power and to master our states of consciousness becomes paramount for our coping with change and trauma in our lives. Meditation, prayer, healing, intimacy, safety, and mystical oneness – all flow spontaneously when we discover our innate ability to move fluidly as light within a world of illusion.
The implications of what you are about to experience here are immeasurable. If you “get it,” you will see the vulnerability of the forces that have so readily hypnotized us and sustained our powerlessness over these last millennia. In the recognition of your power, you will move from any residual sadness, anger, fear, and shame from the past into a place of compassion and gratitude, for it is here that all of our traumas and encumbrances resolve. In embracing this message, you will find true freedom – an expansion of mind that integrates all within a simplicity that we believed lost. There is both teacher and mystic within the very fabric of your being; the mystery school that you seek was so deeply embedded in the matrix of your consciousness that it is inseparable from who you are. The spirituality and luminosity that accompanies the authentic self emerges spontaneously with the resolution of our “trances.” The intimacy, joy, abundance, and serenity that so readily follow suggest that we were destined for an Edenic existence, not removed from such possibility by some primordial failure. The reclamation of our capacity to manifest, a power closely tied to the mastery of our quantum projectors – our minds, holds the key to the transformation and healing of our world. The evidence of this I have laid down in the pages that follow.
These reflections come at a time when all of the many faces of our global experience are presented to us in incredible sensory detail and within a millisecond of cyber communication. The moment we awaken and begin expanding our awareness we are flooded with more information and sensory communication than we have ever witnessed in our previous evolution. The mind as our quantum projector of reality becomes quickly overtaxed using the traditional parameters that were established by family, religious, societal, political, and educational systems. Though we may attempt to reset those boundaries that would enable us to handle the onslaught of such expanding consciousness, we find ourselves seduced nonetheless. In the barrage of sensory overload, we are tempted to withdraw from this bombardment, but to do so is to risk finding ourselves caught off guard, pulled along in the landslide of opinion and thought that surrounds us and is so desperately trying to regain some semblance of order and control. We end up as participants in the drama regardless of how strongly we try to distance ourselves from the violence and its presentation. This, we are coming to realize, is the responsibility and the gift that comes with being a creator on the level of quantum perception. In coming out of the inhibiting altered states of consciousness induced through trauma, we move into a new era where we are the conscious creators of our lives, our bodies, marriages, occupations, and communities, rather than its victims.
Years ago, when I began to glimpse the untapped reserve of power that we possess to heal ourselves, I was overwhelmed with a sense of urgency. As I began to integrate these resources and envision a method of delivery, a hope was born that effective personal healing might reduce the occurrence and impact of trauma in our world. In working with the American medical personnel and officers of the Oklahoma City bombing, I was profoundly moved by the heroic efforts of the rescue personnel who traumatized themselves in their efforts to save the injured. A few years later, working with those involved with TWA Flight 800 in New York, I first heard the sadness and terror that resulted from the personal loss and confusion regarding this mysterious airplane disaster. This event began to prepare us for what was yet to come. At each stage when I witnessed and felt the actual traumatic imprinting of these events, I experienced a stronger impetus to provide more effective intervention for those overwhelmed by such experiences. Just as I thought we had seen the worst, however, a greater trauma arose. With September 11, 2001, the whole picture changed. What was a sense of urgency became a mandate for healing. Millions were affected at the same millisecond in time! Never was there a trauma that overwhelmed so many simultaneously. The first plane caught many off guard, while the impact of the second plane was viewed “live” as we watched the events unfold. We entered a new millennium with “trauma” as the principal theme. I found hope in the Red Cross asking individuals and media to cease their constant replay of the imagery of September 11th. However, not long after, the media discovered “reality TV” and the capacity to hypnotize a viewer to the screen by stimulating adrenaline flow and triggering previous (hypnotic) states of overwhelm. Following the events of September 11, 2001, the terrorists noted our media obsession and our vulnerability. Before long, we were involved in a war whose strategists were consciously employing media tactics that involved videotaped beheadings and the deliberate use of trauma induction as a legitimate psychological weapon. With instantaneous global communication, it was almost impossible to block the broadcast of the videotapes. And at a time nearing the end of 2004, when the news carried the latest reports of the war on terrorism, nature itself gave us cause to reexamine our definition of global trauma. A tsunami of unimaginable power slammed into Indonesia and many other countries leaving entire cities and populations annihilated in its wake. And even as we continued to rush resources to the aid of those ravaged by the tsunami, Hurricane Katrina devastated major cities in the Southern United States, killing thousands and leaving hundreds of thousands homeless, including some of my own family members. The impact of this event was also global, affecting the world economy, the internal balance of power, and the false assumptions we held about our preparedness to deal with trauma on such a scale. We are now beyond “urgency” when it comes to addressing the individual and collective impact of trauma. And this impact is truly personal. Each image we have witnessed in these years triggers our personal adrenaline response and also causes a corresponding repression of our immune system. We no longer have the luxury to repress and ignore our individual and global moments of overwhelm – not, at least, if we are to live healthily.
In my own small way, I have sought in these last two decades to discover effective methods to break the cycle of traumatic encoding. This search has known profound moments of success; however, the lessons learned must now expand to a much larger traumatized population – a global one! It is in the transfer of these lessons of empowerment to each of us that our greatest hope for healing arises. As we resolve the estrangement from self and others that millennia of trauma have imposed on us, we become available to participate in this healing and awakening of humanity. As we move past the trauma-imposed constraints of the “ego,” infinite possibilities unfold before us for healing and transformation. In inviting you on this journey, I offer for your reflection an excerpt of the vision statement that my friend Yvonne Hedeker and I wrote as we founded a charity to address the global impact of trauma. The starting point of all healing is the self!
We believe that all persons possess an innate ability to heal, given the proper tools and resources. We hold that personal transformation creates the foundation for global change. We are committed to reducing the impact and recurrence of trauma in our world.
Michael’s Gift Vision Statement
The invitation was inscribed and embedded deep within us before we were very conscious as a species. It was present from our earliest inception but became buried beneath millions of years of memory – genetic and traumatic imprinting. It has remained intact and still stands. It is an offer of intimacy – not intimacy as it was typically modeled for us, but, rather, the capacity to merge with another as light, generating the ability to heal, love, and let go. This involves our capacity to release all that we are not and to discover the magnificence that we truly are.
In every age and time there are words of comfort and reassurance that help us to see our way through the darkness. Every exile or loss, individual or collective, will summon from deep within us a prophetic voice, an Isaiah or Jeremiah who reminds us that we possess all the resources necessary to restore focus and return home after exile. In an age where terrorism finds ever-new forms of self-expression, a light arises from within to meet the challenge. This radiance allows us to navigate the unfamiliar paths and keeps us safe. Safety is the preoccupation of our day and time. But such a challenge is, ultimately, an inner one. It tenders an invitation to navigate ourselves differently. The almost palpable fear emerging from the events highlighted around us summon a reserve of power held for just such a challenge. The turbulence of the past decade encourages a flight within – not so much to hide from the new storms arising, but to find and address the actual source of our emotional discontent. This inward journey brings us to a creative point where our histories, our choices, and our traumas all converge. It is here at this nexus in the search for understanding and solutions that something new is born.
Science and spirituality are converging to teach us about consciousness and perception. From a “quantum” perspective, what we perceive we create. Global traumas of recent years have riveted our perception and unwittingly drawn us into their manifestation. As a side effect of this siphoning of our creative energy, we are becoming more attentive to the objects of our focus. September 11th does not just happen “out there,” we discover, but is an image constructed and felt in the depths and movements of our visionary mind. Responsibility comes with the power of perception. Through this creative force we discover that the boundaries of our inner world and our outer world are not as clear-cut as we thought. We are immersed in depths of perception for which we were never prepared. We are more profoundly connected to our world, its inhabitants, and even this body that mediates our perception. There are gifts and challenges that come with such heightened relationship.
This book is about mystical intimacy – not intimacy as it was typically modeled for us by parents, teachers, religion or society, but true oneness: the capacity to merge with another as light, generating the ability to heal, love, and let go. This involves our capacity to release all that we are not and to fill the emptiness with the magnificence that we truly are. I am going to talk about our mastery of consciousness and the invitation to embrace the fullness of our destiny and nature. As part of this evolutionary unveiling, we will examine the opportunities we now face to use our spiritual resources to transform our relationships, our bodies, our minds, and the world around us. As a “side effect” of this shift in consciousness, I suspect that we will find an intimacy greater than we imagined possible, a new model for interpersonal relationship and social interaction, and the power to heal many of our diseases. The source of this power may surprise you.
At heart, I am a radical pragmatist. As a child, I wanted to be an archaeologist and to actually uncover and touch the richness of our history. I later did this, digging in Israel as part of an excavation for over thirteen years. When, as a child, I decided I wanted to make more of a difference in our world, I followed the local, culturally endorsed model for healing and became a priest. Upon discovering that the traditional systems actually remembered little of the healing sciences that came naturally to my mother and me, I promptly diverged onto my own path. In the frustration that those I attempted to assist in healing were trapped in parts of their minds that I was not trained to address or access, I used my own intuitive thinking and research skills to create a more effective path. The most important lesson of all was that of self-trust and empowerment. The riches and blessings of my journey form the backdrop for the lessons which I am obliged to share. Many of us have digested reams of material that have nurtured our intellects and minds through many stages of personal and spiritual growth. The multitude of self-help books have inspired and challenged our growth, predisposing us for change and honing our willpower. In speaking to the intellect, however, they did not always reach those places where our pain holds us captive. It is the place of memory and is largely non-linear: it involves the flow of consciousness and our power to master it. Therefore, this mystical journey that I propose to you is pragmatic beyond description. It hints at a physics of mysticism about which I shall discourse from my limited human experience. But this discussion is not abstract or designed to inspire your intellect so much as it is intended to summon your power and to create a bridge. This bridge, once erected, offers the opportunity to realize our deepest hopes and dreams. It is very real and very much about the infinite resources we hold within. It is also timely. The heart of our discussion centers on our capacity to create relational bridges. We may call this search “relationality,” “spirituality,” or “intimacy” – it is the same connection that we all seek. All of our emotions are relational bridges. I have learned this through both love and trauma. Let us take a look at our capacity to link heart to heart.
Some time ago, while visiting Evanston, Illinois, I had the privilege to view the film: What the #$*! Do We Know!?1 A tremendous portion of that film resonates with what you will encounter in this text. The chapters of this text were nearing completion when this movie surfaced. Much of this work is about the power of perception and the empowerment occurring through application of the principles of quantum physics. While feeling validated by the findings and shared experiences of the interdisciplinary pioneers in the film, I became profoundly aware of the gap that was reflected when it came to explaining how we might become empowered enough to become “unstuck” from our unconscious perceptions, beliefs, addictions, and behaviors. This entire text is devoted to the liberation of the bodymind from its 1.5 million years of unconscious evolution and encoding. While the interdisciplinary perspective that I offer is somewhat unique, many of us have found ourselves reaching the same conclusions, irrespective of our paths.
The past decade has revealed much about the creative power of perception: what we focus upon we become; what we carry within we attract. The act of observation is not passive, but creative. So says quantum physics. In a world where victim-hood is, for many, a preferable escape or safer illusion of being, discussions of power raise skepticism, confusion, and even anger. To make things even more challenging, we discover that our emotions unite us in an instant with a person, circumstance or event, bridging the limits of space and time. My mother taught me this simple principle as a child. It sparked within me a passion to understand her capacity to feel in her body the events that happened to her children. I knew that I was committed to this quest when I suddenly sat upright in bed in Rome, Italy, at the moment of her death in Louisiana. I had been awakened by a sudden shift from within and not by anything outside in the cool silence of the city of Rome that night. I always knew that I would feel the moment of her passing; there was that much love present, and its power transcended space and time. She died beneath her favorite painting acquired from our old church: “Simon of Cyrene takes up the cross.” How appropriate for a woman who spent so much of her life with the ability to feel and ease the pain of others.
Power reveals itself to us at some of the most unexpected moments and in some of the most unpredictable ways. Originally, I thought that the power to heal, for instance, was the proprietary right of the ministers and priesthood of our world. While in formal ministry as a Catholic priest, I never felt any energy exchanges from my hands, but within three months of leaving “formal” ministry, with plans to begin full-time teaching, my hands seemed to become active and led me to a spontaneous healing of my own body. I never made it to a traditional teaching position at a university or to the Jesuits who had invited me to join them. In my current healing work, I do not formally affiliate with any one system or belief, for the nature and scope of my work is truly universal (“katholikos” in the original Greek means “universal”). The demands of the energy coming from my hands dictated their own path. I did not discover until a few years ago that I had a great uncle on my mother’s side of the family who could also send some form of light or healing energy from his hands, beginning his service to others as I had – healing viruses like herpes simplex (warts) and other skin disorders. Ironically, it was actually my second cousin, a nun, who provided me with the details about this! My first realization that I could send some form of healing energy to others through my hands was, in fact, an accidental occurrence of which I was oblivious until my friend told me what had happened: healing the skin ailment in his feet that had already defied medical intervention. Power introduces itself to us in truly unanticipated and surprising situations. Thomas Kuhn, in his book, The Structure of Scientific Revolutions, states that this is the way of authentic paradigm shifts in consciousness.2 These revolutionary changes often come in the most unexpected and spontaneous ways.
We are at the beginning of a great awakening of consciousness, a great paradigm shift in intimacy. The illusions of separation that allowed me to remain estranged from you and vice versa are dissolving. Some of this is by necessity. Hidden behind the dense energies of my traumas I did not have to feel your pain, but I was also more alone. Trauma imposes a weight and a density on the bodymind. In the process it provides an insulation to keep me from internalizing further pain. With the weight of my own trauma history to mask my fear and pain, I do not have to attend so closely to your own. Such numbness is not selective, however, for as we block our pain, we reduce our capacity for happiness – for this too comes through the same emotional channels. As I commit to my own spiritual healing and “lighten up,” I discover that I can increasingly feel the moments of your pain and, by joining with you, facilitate our mutual healing. Freed from the illusions and burdens of these states, I can feel the authenticity of your hurt and sadness, for we are truly parts of each other. This mandates that I continue my own clearing so that the energies being released do not backup into my own system. The deeper we commit to loving another, the more the physics of spirituality demands of us. The more I commit to my personal healing, the more deeply we are energetically joined. With this promise of heightened intimacy, I desire to be present to you without burdening our exchange with the pain and powerlessness imposed by my past.
The trances imposed by our life traumas keep us separated from each other. “Trauma” is the label that we give to those trances that are induced through physical or emotional overwhelm. We have all known such moments of encoding, given the sensitivity of the nervous system. Our degree of encoding varies, however, and is relative to the quality and vulnerability of the boundaries that provide our security. The earlier in our lives that we experience a boundary violation, the more potent will be the emotional charge of the trance that follows. While it is true that we move in and out of altered states of consciousness many times an hour, including those states of fantasy and daydreaming that carry us through difficult times, it is the painful trance induced by overwhelming stress and trauma that poses a problem. Our minds are instantly seized by these moments of pain and pulled out of present time, removing us from authentic presence and communication. At such moments I act from fear and the script, no longer hearing you as you are, but receiving your words through the filters of my own history and pain. This aloneness is not acceptable to me. To walk the path of beauty I will have to make myself authentic first. This is within my grasp. From this place, then, I may recognize you, remember you, and truly know you. Intimacy flows freely in such a place.
In our current world, the trances come rapidly: several every hour. Pain induces this automatic protective reaction we call “trance.” It is mostly a subconscious and automatic protection deeply rooted in our physiology and nature. Due to the excess of visual imagery, auditory over-stimulation, etc., we are apparently producing too much adrenaline. Under repeated sensory bombardment with stress and trauma-inducing images, our immune systems are slowing their production of T-cells to allow for increased steroid hormone production in order to assist us in dealing with crisis. Our endocrine systems are over-taxed. If we do not curb or address this over-stimulation of our senses, we will become ill. This is our wake-up call. Have you been wondering about the remarkable rise in autoimmune disorders over these last years? One source is obvious: how long have we been living in crisis or its replayed images?
Media has discovered that ratings rise when the population is hypnotized to the screen by the triggering of adrenaline-producing altered states. This has given rise to “reality TV” and the proliferation of trauma-based imagery and advertising. We are captured by images that in any way resemble our own encoded states of consciousness. The triggering of our traumatic memories gives rise to increased steroid hormone production (adrenaline), endorphins, and enkephalins that are generated within the bodymind to produce the necessary “fight, flight, or freeze” response to crisis. They offer the momentary promise of strength, calm, and clarity to address the crisis. This is the lure of the trigger. This system, however, was not designed to be running continuously.
Global trances like that induced on September 11th of 2001 mandate our self-care. Any “terrorism” left unresolved in our personal or collective history surfaces, I assure you, under the continuous replay of archetypal images of boundary violations and trauma. Terrorists choose archetypal symbols or values to induce the greatest fear in the largest percentage of the population. They attack our common symbols of industrial achievement, economic prosperity, defense, and democratic rule. At such moments of invasion, we spontaneously “trance” to protect ourselves. It would appear that we have been trancing – repressing our pain subconsciously and automatically for at least 1.5 million years. We no longer even recognize these altered states of mind from authentic presence. I have seen this in my work with over eleven thousand trauma survivors in these last years. In the worst of cases, we begin to identify ourselves with the pain of the trance imposed by trauma or abuse. We identify ourselves with the shame over time and begin to live from its frequency and level of morality. But such negativity is not our nature and will create a profound sense of loss as we move away from our power and the clarity that emanates from the Source within us. We call ourselves home when we diverge too far from center.
We have come to this planet, earth, for purposes of empowerment – for both self and others. Many souls in feminine form have come to reclaim their power from oppressive persons and systems: embracing their strength and autonomy in this lifetime. Many, in masculine form, have come to surrender their illusions of power to find the strength that comes from tenderness and vulnerability. All come to find balance.
As we begin this journey, I share one prayer that I find helpful. I am uncertain of its origin, but I have made some modifications as a result of my own meditations. It is patterned after the traditional language of the “Our Father.”
Prime Creator, Intelligent Infinity, the One Source of All,
Which dwells in perfect balance,
Sacred is the vibration of the Logos,
May the plan of our higher selves be realized
As we surrender to the Divine within.
May we manifest our place in the plan.
May we experience all we need to overcome.
Teach us to release and empty that we may be filled!
Guide us through the shadows of our fears,
That we may be freed of the illusions of separation,
For ours is the wisdom, the power and the glory,
Beyond time and space.
So be it.
(Modified Version, Original author, Unknown)
Then afterward I will pour out my spirit upon all mankind. Your sons and daughters shall prophesy, Your old men shall dream dreams, Your young men shall see visions.
(Book of Joel 3:1-2)
The paths we tread as beings of light cannot be navigated by the rational mind alone. If I had tried to use pure rationality to direct my life decisions, I doubt that I would be doing the healing work I do today. I was first taught by the “visionary” abilities of others about our capacity to transcend the limitations of the rational mind. My mother was the first to teach me about our mystical natures: There is a way of “seeing” that transcends the traditional laws of physics but is sometimes more real than the current “scientific” world we know. She demonstrated the importance of this knowledge when I was once in a car accident. When I eventually called her three hours after the accident, I discovered that she had been meditating or praying, waiting for my call. She even pinpointed the time of the accident as 3:23 p.m. and stated that she felt in her body the moment that the accident occurred – growing “ice cold” and feeling a wave of fear pass over her. This “feeling” had led her to pray for my safety; I had no doubt that it helped. In another demonstration of her ability to connect with her children, she called the Veteran’s Hospital where my brother Jerry was domiciled. She asked what had happened to him, whereupon the hospital employee informed her that the ambulance was arriving at that moment to take him for x-rays. He had apparently fallen and broken his ankle, but the employee was disgruntled because no one was supposed to inform her of the accident until a formal diagnosis had been obtained and emergency care fully provided. The employee thought that a co-worker had called her prematurely and “broken protocol.” Her empathy and vision at moments of crisis led me to respect the authenticity and importance of her type of perception. She experienced an episode of this nature with each of the children in our family. Over time I came to realize that such “sight” is not relegated to the few, but is inherent to our nature as spiritual beings. Like many of us, I was skeptical about any abilities of my own and required the assistance of some “messengers” to change this belief. These guides appeared quite spontaneously and gently directed me down the path that I now walk. My hope is that the personal insights I gained from these “angels” can, likewise, facilitate your own spiritual progress in a manner that honors your own timing and spiritual evolution. Perhaps these accounts may ease your own transition.
I recall that one of my friends in the college seminary, Isaac, around 1977, stated that he had experienced a series of dreams which indicated that in the future I would be doing some type of healing work with my hands. I responded skeptically at the time, commenting that I had never felt any such abilities in my hands or anywhere else. Isaac stated that this was not too surprising, but added that some people were able to tap into the consciousness or energy surrounding the body and could read or “see” events, truths, and facts about life that resided in this emanation of consciousness. Isaac stated that his grandmother could do this as well. He added that some people are more naturally oriented to be “receivers,” sometimes getting spontaneous images while in the presence of others. Others, he indicated, are predisposed as “senders” who possess a presence or energy field that enables others to see images like those he had been receiving. Over time I came to realize that we are all capable of both: receiving and sending energy as part of our nature as beings of light. At that early stage in my own development, I remember just shrugging and wondering what all this weirdness meant. Though we were in a Catholic seminary at the time, I wasn’t sure how strictly orthodox this would be considered. I was erroneously imprinted with the message during my religious instruction that mysticism was restricted to the few and the gifted – those who were strictly chosen by God! Such spiritual gifts could not be earned or acquired in any way. I wondered where my mother and Isaac fit into the bigger picture of things, since both of them seemed fairly normal to me, but definitely gifted. I also was not sure how I felt about being one who helped others to see images or memories. Looking back, I think that Isaac was a blessing who provided one of the first steps to prepare me for what was to come. Over twenty-five years later, I know a great deal more about the science of consciousness and our mystical nature. Even the religious systems have come around a bit more since then. One of my spiritual directors, Janusz Ihnatowicz, from my college years entitled his doctoral dissertation: “The Ordinary Mysticism of the Laity.” His premise was that there existed a vast number of unknown or “anonymous” mystics who were simply ordinary, everyday people who meditated and prayed on a daily basis, and who were profoundly contributing to the whole of spiritual consciousness. I believe this to be true. He helped to normalize mysticism for me by his teachings and example.
Another stepping-stone presented itself in my college years through my friend Alfred who shared a vivid dream in which he swore I had been a priest-healer in “another lifetime.” I humored him and brushed it off, but the truth remained that his description annoyed and disturbed me – and for a variety of reasons. For one, Alfred’s dreams had often proved prophetic and usually held at least a grain of truth. The second reason was more theological in nature. Given the Catholic fervor about making sure that we make the most of this lifetime in case it is the only one we have, the whole reincarnation issue was something not to be discussed openly. When I later asked one of our more conservative bishops about this, he quietly commented that the truth was that we just do not know if past lives exist or not. Since we cannot prove it either way, he elaborated, the church has traditionally taught that we should all just focus on the present lifetime and make the most of it. I recalled that my mother had experienced six miscarriages and stillbirths; the notion of reincarnation offered some consolation when I thought of the lost opportunities of those lives ended so prematurely. In the interim, I remained open to the discussion and found it surprising to discover that Hassidic Judaism had always taught a doctrine of reincarnation or “transmigration.” Rabbi Yonassan Gershom’s work: Beyond the Ashes: Cases of Reincarnation from the Holocaust3 was a real eye-opener and affirmation for me. I was surprised to learn from the Catholic scholars that even St. Jerome, renowned for his linguistic and literary talents – having translated the Bible into Latin from the Greek and Aramaic, believed that he did so easily because he had been a scribe in a former life. It impressed me that a Catholic “Saint” believed in other lifetimes. The book by Dr. Brian Weiss, Many Lives, Many Masters,4 wherein he chronicled the spontaneous appearance of regression into past lives and the resolution of all of his clients’ pain symptoms during therapy, also had a profound impact on me, but this occurred after I had already entered the therapy field. Even prior to this, however, when I had first left formal ministry and was considering a career shift into the therapy field, I remembered Alfred’s dream, but only after experiencing some very vivid dreams of my own.
When I left formal ministry and was considering full-time teaching, perhaps even responding to an offer to join the Jesuits, I had a series of very powerful dreams that affected me profoundly and redirected me to the healing sciences. In the most vivid of these, I was one of three students (scribes) in training in a red granite chamber inside a pyramidal structure. Our instructor, a splendidly attired priestess opened an ornate golden shrine and removed a scroll from it. She unrolled the scroll, whereupon I discovered that I could read the writing easily. I awakened from the dream, feeling disappointed that the world I currently lived in did not seem anywhere near as spiritually nurturing as the culture of my dream. The dream and its mindset, in some ways, seemed more real than that of the waking world. When I finally checked the history books to determine the validity of the unusual names from the scroll, the names and locations were real and could be dated precisely to four thousand years ago.
The strongest support for the existence of “past life” perception was of a profound nature and occurred unexpectedly during a training workshop with Gail Konz, a world-renowned intuitive and healer. During the final exercise of her workshop, I was flooded with an inexplicable energy and startled by a body of emotion that emanated from the area of my solar plexus and, much to my surprise, was even physically felt by those seated nearest me. From its nature and intensity, I knew instantly that this force was most certainly not the product of any accumulated experience in this lifetime. Being predominantly “clairsentient” or “kinesthetic” – one who feels memories and issues rather than a “clairvoyant” who sees such images, I was overwhelmed by the profound recollections of having spent eons with her in friendship and service in the past. I no longer merely “believed” in past lives, I remembered from a profound level in my being that such depths of relationship do exist and remain intact over vast expanses of time. This generated quite a shift from my traditional religious upbringing, but was undeniable in its reality and impact upon my spirit and my work.
In the final analysis, however, we need not become overly concerned with the question of “past lives.” The fact remains that any unresolved issues that we hold from “the past” are fully linked to this lifetime and the body that we now manifest. This is the “karma” referred to in many religious systems. “Karma” is precisely this: the unfinished lessons of the past carried into this lifetime/this body in order to facilitate resolution and healing; it is simply the “unfinished” or incomplete memory or scene, imprinted in our consciousness with “less than love” present. It is a deficiency of love, light captured in the matrix of consciousness on an energetic level. This “blueprint” we bear with us as lessons on an energetic and spiritual level as we evolve upward. Recently, while working with a gifted client who identified herself as a medical intuitive, she described the interrelationship she saw between the energetic “blueprint” of previous lifetimes and the merging of this pattern with the physiological structure and DNA of her body from the moment of conception onward. She was able to see a specific pattern of trauma that was intergenerational through her mother and used her perception to address this trauma that represented itself during the earliest stages of this lifetime. As she reframed this experience, we both felt, at the same moment, a strong energy release from her nervous system. I have never felt such releases when the claims are imaginary or spurious in nature.