Know ThySelf
A workbook and journal for modern living
Copyright
Published by Heart Space Publications
PO Box 1085, Daylesford,
Vic, 3460, Australia.
Tel 0450 260 348
Graysonian Press South Africa is an imprint of Heartspace Publications.
Postal: PO Box 4389, Cresta, 2118 Tel +27 11 431 1274
For information about this or any of our other books:
pat@heartspacebooks.com
or visit us at:
http://www.heartspacebooks.com
All rights reserved; no part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying or otherwise, without the prior permission of the author.
Originally printed in South Africa
Whilst every care has been taken to check the accuracy of the information in this book, the publisher cannot be held responsible for any errors, omissions or originality.
Copyright © 2010 Pat Grayson
ISBN: 978-0-620-46117-7
ePub:
ISBN: 978-0-9874997-6-9
Introduction
Do you ever feel success is always just around the corner, but the corner never ends?
Or that you are not quite ready for happiness and that dissatisfaction gnaws at your gut?
What about money? There is never really enough, is there?
You drift along in life, not quite making it.
And what about God? You believe there is a creator – after all, something created all of this, yet he, she, it does not seem to be there for you.
If you have the will and the desire, Know ThySelf will show you that your life can work and that you are not alone.
It will teach you to identify and clear the issues that are blocking you. It will also teach you that when you remove your fear you will see that you are a child of God and will know its support.
Know ThySelf is a workbook that you work through at your own pace. There are many lessons, and each lesson makes use of contemplations. These take you to aspects of yourself that you didn’t know existed. All your revelations are journalised so you can plot your growth as you go along.
Know ThySelf, a Workbook for Modern Living.
Dedication
If it was not for Denise, this book would not have been written.
Mom your influence on me cannot be measured. You are the sun that I revolve around.
I thank my guides and angels, known and unknown for their support in my personal growth.
My appreciation goes out to those people who hurt me and for those I hurt. Thank you for the lessons.
To Judy Barnes – a friend who taught me so much about writing.
Journey of Self (overcoming fear)
It seemed that I was born into darkness, where images could just be discerned. Roots of trees as thick as a man’s body lay strewn above the ground, like slumbering serpents supporting trunks of massive height and girth. Thick humus carpeted the ground, debris from the solid canopy that hid the sky far above. It was soft to walk on, damp and mildewy. The grotto of my mind was a cold and thriving place for all manner of creepy-crawly things, things that slithered in the near dark. Leaves constantly rustled as some creature scurried away from a predator, or was the predator. Things growled and hissed as fights were often heard while combatants struggled for survival.
In this cauldron of my early life, fear clutched at my gut and was a constant companion. Somehow, some way, I knew that to stay in this claustrophobic dungeon was to be vulnerable. I had endured this tomb of mind from childhood to adulthood. But a sense niggled at my mind pushing me to move and seek something better. I did not know where this sense came from, but I felt it could be trusted. So I determined to leave the relative security of the known for the unknown, and set off to find myself.
At first my progress was slow, and for a time it seemed to get even darker, which scared me more. But as I grew and developed, I learnt that to move from one mind space to another can incur darkness, as our fear takes over. I continued the journey, stumbling on, falling over life’s impediments and overcoming difficulties. For this journey of self I was alone. I had to be, as no one could share it with me. Nor did I have any idea of the direction to take – how could I? I did not know the destination and if I did, how could I know if I had made it? Never having faced myself before, it felt awkward, like wearing a coat backwards.
It was difficult cutting through the thick bush that clung to me like a thousand silent arms – arms like beggars searching, restraining and clutching, all the time demanding. The terrain was always uphill and so my arms and legs were exhausted from the pushing and pulling as I climbed higher and higher. At times I would slip and plummet to a point where I had been some time before. I would lie there feeling sorry for myself, and wonder what lesson I was supposed to learn. It crossed my mind many times to give up, as the journey was too arduous. Nevertheless, I struggled on.
After a while I started to learn the ways of my inner realm and it became easier. I developed an assurance that things would keep improving and so I was able to cover more ground. The once formidable dark and dank depths of my inner self did not seem so hostile. It was the same, yet different. What had changed? I had, and as if to support my evolution, I was given beams of light that radiated through the bush, showing the way. It illuminated the jungle of my mind, giving beauty and form to its interior. But there was more journeying to be done and so on and upwards I clambered.
Once I came face to face with glowing eyes, menacing from a long black shape. It snarled and spat, while its breath soured my nostrils. Had this creature confronted me in the past, it would have devoured me, but I held my nerve and it crawled away.
Although it seemed to be years that I had been on this journey, I sensed that I was making progress, as the darkness gradually gave away to light. High above through the trees was blue. I could not understand what this was, but felt it to be friendly. As I continued, somehow I knew that my direction was correct and that each step took me assuredly to a warmer place.
Suddenly, without warning, I was out of the jungle and on a stone ledge that jutted out of the valley walls. The sun shone a golden protection, nurturing and comforting and the open space was liberating.
I looked over the jungle that had previously owned me and could see the rivers that I had forded and the scrub that had cut my hands. At the time I could not see any logic or plan to it, but now it was all so obvious and perfect. From my position of elevation, the wilds were beautiful. Yet to reach this point I had been obliged to travel through those wilds and endure the experiences.
I am now stronger, forged in the knowledge of who I am, but I also know that the journey of self is never over, as there will be new internal frontiers to conquer. But for now I revel in the joy of knowing that I have won the victory of the journey of self.
“I took it upon myself to get to know my myth, and I regarded this as the task of tasks… I simply had to know what unconscious or preconscious myth was forming me.” – Carl Jung
The Course (KTS)
KTS is a 10 week course consisting of daily lessons and introspections.
Each day’s lessons will take approximately 40 minutes. It does not matter if you miss out a day here and there, but it would be best to set a goal to do at least 5 lessons per week. Speeding up will not make you learn or grow any faster. Take your time and progress in a consistent and thorough way.
There is absolutely no doubt, that if you dedicate yourself to the lessons and make this work a part of your life, you will grow beyond your wildest dreams. It may not always be easy. Sometimes growth be difficult and challenging but remember you can’t grow a healthy crop without lovingly clearing the land and planting the seeds. By investing the time, your work will produce a rich and rewarding harvest.
Unlike most courses, KTS is experiential and not intellectual. In this course you will need to roll up your sleeves and get your hands dirty. Most psychologists will agree that to transform, you have to dig deep.
Your first journal entry.
I suggest you keep a journal over the course of reading this book. You can make these entries using your eBook device’s note taking function if it has one, or keep a notebook handy. Are you prepared to roll up your sleeves and work hard to improve yourself?
When you see this heading Journal Notes: it’s my suggestion to you to keep a diary…
As your diary work is so important and so personal to you, I suggest that you buy yourself a really nice one – one that will last you years. And one that you feel really comfortable with.
“Knowing others is wisdom: knowing the self is enlightenment.” – Tao Te Ching
“The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honours the servant.” – Albert Einstein
The Premise of this Book
I believe that the purpose of life is to have an ongoing relationship with God, that is, to become one with The Source. However, we invariably have ‘issues’ and get so lost in them that we get distracted from our natural path. For instance, it would be difficult to feel the Supreme Being’s love if your husband has just beaten you up for the umpteenth time or if you are always in and out of jobs, continually in debt and stressed out about a lack of income. Understandably your focus would be elsewhere – your issues are impediments.
God awakens us through dysfunction. We have a choice to wallow in our issues or to resolve them. By removing them we open the way for growth towards our higher self and God.
So how do we clear our impediments? By becoming aware of our disruptive life patterns and getting to know ourselves. Then and only then can we unravel and dismantle them.
This workbook will help you identify your issues and give you the tools to clear them.
Are you happy with your life?
Peace
This course will teach you how to be at peace with yourself and your environment. What do I mean by peace? It’s a life that does not operate with a frantic mindset. Without peace there can be no connection to God.
Are you at peace with yourself and your life?
If you were to die today, would you be satisfied that you have achieved all that you would like?
Do you know who you want to be and are you that person?
The Big 5
I am about to teach you the ‘Big 5’. The ‘Big 5’, will help you for the rest of your life if you allow it to. The sooner you learn to put the ‘Big 5’ to work for you, the better your life will be. These 5 disciplines are a mixture of self help, being positive and spirituality. They are:
Are you willing to invoke the big 5?
Gnosis – to know the divine spark by direct experience. This is different to trust and faith.
What most people want from life
The following 3 sentences are typical of answers from people who have attended the KTS course and are in response to the question, what do you want to get out of the course?
The above 3 represent what most participants want, that is, find their creator and to be happy.
What do you think of the above 3 points and do you have any to add?
Why Knowing Thyself is so important?
“We cannot become what we need to be, remaining what we are.” Unknown
“If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always got.” Unknown
Knowledge + (Applied) Wisdom = Peace or Knowledge of Self = Empowerment
You are bombarded with thoughts every second of every day. Most steal your clarity and mould you unconsciously into a form that you do not like or perhaps are not even aware of. They rob you of your innate power and control your life. Negative or unconscious thoughts make you do and say things that are not compatible with who you are or who you want to be.
If you knew how many thoughts direct your life you would be stunned. In just one year there can be millions and each and every one of them has the power to reduce your focus and stifle your potential or to assist you in manifesting what you want. Most thoughts however, are of a revolving theme, themes that rotate thousands of times, thereby creating your circumstances. These can be emotive issues, frustrations, impatience, anger, peevishness and defensiveness, all taking you down the wrong route.
The things that you tell yourself are the things that you become, so does it not make sense to become aware of what you think?
Because of the nature of our society, where everyone else around us appears to be enduring some form of negative thinking – you don’t see it and all seems normal. Initially, to rectify your habitual thinking takes courage and persistence. You begin by bringing the thoughts that consume your interior into your awareness, the thoughts that in the past have built the patterns that set your life. When you slow your logical brain down, you can see clearly where your direction is contra to what is good for you, where we are out of alignment with what you truly want.
To know yourself is to understand the areas in which you are strong and to acknowledge your ‘weaknesses. From that point of self-disclosure, you can begin to make miraculous changes.
Your Life’s Work
The purpose of this workbook is to give you methods and tools to assist you to process as many aspects of your life as possible. It covers many topics and these will have a different significance at different stages of your growth. It is a working companion that will inspire you on a daily basis.
You live in a limited and restricted reality. But by understanding yourself, you can remove some of the restrictions.
To know thyself is a wonderful and unique journey of self-discovery. At times this may feel like a daunting task but you will reap the benefits of untold rewards. The path may be long and you are likely to encounter many twists and turns along the way. You will soon realise that the journey is limitless and has no real end. Each key you receive along the way will unlock another door. Good luck in your internal travels. Remember – The Kingdom of Heaven lies within you.
Cognitive
You must take responsibility for your own development. Therefore you need to be conscious as the therapy is cognitive therapy. It is only through being cognitive that it can be effective.
How to use this Book
This book is not a quick fix. It is an inter-active manual. I suggest that you work through this work book more than once. Each time you go through the process you will derive further benefit. At first, some of the sections may seem irrelevant but as you grow and develop and re-read it, the essence of the lessons will seep in and will become more integrated into how you live your life on a day-to-day basis.
Did you notice the word work in ‘work book’ was emphasised?
As you proceed through Know Thy Self you will see many Stop Points (in rectangular boxes). Each is an issue pertinent to that topic. Take the time to work through these and think about how they apply to you.
There are many Introspections. These appear on an ad hock basis and are given to you to allow you to focus in greater detail on the issue that requires clarity. This book proposes that you analyse the many facets of your life. Over time, you are advised to introspect on as wide a range of issues as possible. As you progress you are offered a list of possible topics for self-analysis.
As a writer I use stories to teach. I call these ‘The ramblings of a writer’.
Lastly, you will derive greater benefit if you write down and record your thoughts, lessons and anything that annoys or resonates with you in a journal in the space provided.
Willingness
This book or any other book on self-help will only work for you if you are driven by an outcome and have the will to succeed.
Let me give you an example. John and Peter are runners. They are of similar abilities and builds. John has won many races and has aspirations of becoming an Olympic champion. Peter runs because girls run and Peter likes girls. He couldn’t care less about winning races because to do so requires hard work. He is not willing to sweat, strain or hurt himself, – ‘No way,’ he thinks.
John is a champion in the making and is willing to put in the hard work. Peter is not a champion in an athletic sense but he does know lots of girls. He’s willing to do anything, even run to meet a new lady.
Both of the above men have a will to achieve a given goal. Do YOU have the will to help and heal yourself?
The opposite of will is apathy. Without the will you achieve nothing.
Your design is to achieve and you can achieve far more than you could ever imagine. But you must have the will. Think for a minute of a person who has been saying for years that s/he will create something better. But it doesn’t happen as s/he is too apathetic to go and do it. That person may be you.
Self Help = Improving your life
Have you ever asked what self-help really means? Stating the obvious, it means helping yourself. You do this with the aid of this and other books, videos, etc, all of which could be called tools. Continuing from the willingness above, these tools can only help if you have the will to apply them.
Here is a poem that I wrote, called Express Itself
Compare your life to that of a tree -
At first there is a seed.
You a foetus
The tree germinates
You are born
Strong green shoots search for sunlight
You reached for mother’s breast and experiences
The sapling gets stronger, firmly burying roots into nurturing soil
Whilst you walk, speak and start to express individuality.
Years pass, the tree has grown and although not of full height
Does not blow or wash away
You have grown to fend for yourself; life is spread before you
But wait a minute, what happens next, the tree can remain in shadow
Short of sunlight
It has a choice – remain stunted or express itself!
You have the same choice – grow or remain unfulfilled
It is in the trees genes to shrug off inadequacy
To grow strong, tall and ever upwards
To arch the sky and taking its place in the sun.
What about you, can you fulfill your natural right and shrug off imperfection?
or do you languish under the shade of others, stunted and withered?
Remember if you were already perfect, you would not be here.
Journal Notes:
Spirituality = The essence of what we are
Many people think that by embracing a spiritual life, they can ignore their human issues. On the contrary, we cannot efficiently embrace The Divine if our human failings are not attended to. By not clearing ‘your’ issues you actually block your spirituality. You need to understand that the mind, especially a negative mind, blocks the soul from emerging.
I am going to pause here for a minute to say that throughout this work I call that ‘Mysterious Power’, the Supreme Being as well as other names. I suggest that you use a name that is comfortable for you, such as God or Allah, etc.) You may not believe my premise, but I ask you to continue reading and to keep an open mind while you work with the processes. After all, what have you got to loose?
The following is loosely based from writings by Gopi Krishna
There is intelligence in animal migration, cell division and biology, as there is in all nature.
There would be no intelligence in us if there were no intelligence behind the universe.
It is the intelligence behind the universe that I refer to as God. I have a reverence for that intelligence.
Throughout this work I suggest that, if ‘your life is to work, then it is more likely to come about if you have a spiritual belief. My life did not work until I started to find The Divine within me. I shall use the sea as an analogy.
There is the sea which pulsates with life and energy. I am part of the sea but yet I cannot see it, nor can I comprehend its vastness. I say to my self what is the sea? I am made in its likeness but I don’t understand it.
For the first part of my life I was separated from the sea, I was a drop (perhaps a drip is a better way of putting it).
As a drop I was not able to flow with the energy of the currents. I was out of sync with the tides. I did not know the grandness of the seaweed, nor the coral. I did not comprehend its magnificence. Yet as a drop, I thought that I knew it all and that I was ok. For years I swam around in my own little ocean to no avail. So I swam harder and still got nowhere. Still my little drop was on its own and drying out.
It was only when I started to understand how we as humans work and how the Universe works that I found myself back as a comprehensive component of the sea. Only when I aligned myself with The Creator (who obviously is the sea in this analogy) did I truly start to connect with the Universe and to master myself and life. We are one, but as a drop I separated my self from the whole.
Another analogy: If the strings of a guitar are too loose, there will be sound but not great sound. If the strings are too tight, the sound will also be discordant. To give the best sound the strings have to be finely tuned to offer the correct vibration. They need the right balance, neither too tight nor too loose. As humans we also have to have the right vibration. We can only achieve the right vibration when we align ourselves with The Divine. If our vibrations are too fast we will survive, but the tune of our life will be of poor quality. If you are in balance with the Universe, your life will work.
“God is at home, it is we who have gone for a walk” – Meister Echardt
“Without divine assistance I cannot succeed; with it I cannot fail.”
“In whatever way a human being shall seek me, in that way he can find me. The paths are many, but ultimately all come to me” – Bhagavad-Gita
“You are not here to contact your higher self: you are here to claim it “- Unknown
What is God to you?
‘And have we now forgotten that powerful Friend? Or do we imagine we no longer need His assistance? Unknown
‘I have lived a long time and the longer I live, the more convincing proofs I see of this truth.
“That God governs in the affairs of men.” – Benjamin Franklin.
Mind, Body and Spirit
As humans we have three main components. These are mind, body and soul. A lot of people think that they can bypass the responsibility of the mind and head straight towards their spiritual aspect. Every aspect of our being needs to be holistically integrated. One does not work without the other.
For instance, if we are to have a relationship with our Higher Self, I believe that a healthy body is important. Our higher self is energy, and so is our body. If our body is sick or tired as a result of too many toxins or over work then it is less likely to be able to make that connection.
Faith
You are unlikely to connect to Source, if you have little or no faith
Doubt sees the obstacles, Faith sees the way.
Doubt sees the darkest night, Faith sees the day.
Doubt dreads to take a step, Faith soars on high.
Doubt questions ‘Who believes?’ Faith Answers ‘I’
Unknown
Faith is knowing the future will be ok. Where as, trust is letting it happen now.
Faith is an expression of gratitude for your relationship with the creator. Fear is a lack of faith in the creator. Faith is strength in knowing that what is to happen to you is what you need – not necessarily what you want!
Introspections and Preparation
“Your answers lie inside you. The answers to life’s questions lie inside you. All you need to do is look, listen and trust.” – Cherie Carter-Scott
“Prayer is when you talk to God. Meditation is when God talks to you.” – Diana Robinson
As good as prayer is, when you talk, you don’t learn and as this work book is about knowing thyself, you must listen.
To help you with your process of getting to know thyself, you will make use of introspection.
The dictionary says that introspection allows for one to examine one’s thoughts and feelings or observations of one’s mental processes, i.e. how you react to certain situations. The clarity you derive gives a sense of calm and direction.
Introspection is a most natural and easy process of special awareness.
Stilling the Mind
Your mind is a kaleidoscope of crazy mixed up thoughts bombarding you all day. For any real contemplation to take place you need to shut the mind up for the time of introspection. Throughout this book I give you tools to do just that. Meditation, contemplation or deep relaxation is a method of allowing you to ‘just be’ without interference of random thoughts. It is also a method of plain and simple thinking. It is a process of focusing your thoughts on any subject you chose to clarify.
Once your mind is still and you apply your attention to the subject at hand, you will be amazed at what transpires. The insights you gain once you penetrate beyond the noise of your mind will startle you. For example, by focusing on the feeling that is the result of guilt you will dissipate it. Yes it will, or at least it will be reduced. The feeling of guilt is likely to return but when it does, you have the tool to ‘go-in’ and dissolve it once again. By doing so on a regular basis you will find that each time you ‘go-in’, it will take less time to reduce the guilt, which will return for shorter periods.
When you focus on the guilt, you will get to know what it feels like.
Stop – Does it feel like butterflies or a dull pain? Where does the guilt sit, in your stomach or your heart, where?
Journal Notes:
Once you know what the guilt feels like, you will realise that it is an old companion, one you have been toting around for years. By having the awareness of where it sits in you, you can diminish it.
Remember that guilt is created by an accumulation of experiences. By using this tool to diminish it, you will also improve your ability to manage your thoughts. As a result you will become more positive in your day-to-day actions.
Let’s assume that an issue you are concerned about resulted from an argument. The clarity you will gain from introspection will be of great benefit. You will see your part in the argument, whether you were realistic or not. You will gain a better understanding of the other person’s perspective and therefore a way forward. Or maybe you have a decision to make – to have a relationship or not, or to accept a job offer. Total focus is like running a movie in your head. You are able to see all the options clearly and gain understanding as a result. There will be many insights that never occurred to you before, insights that are brought to your attention by your Higher Self.
Norman Vincent Peal (theologian and writer) offered the opinion, “Only a quiet mind can think at maximum efficiency.”
On reflection and some of the great religions
Introspection is a form of meditation. Some Christians may be wary of the idea of meditation. However, the KG V:01 of the Bible discusses the benefits and need to meditate on no less than twenty occasions. In fact all the major religions have been propagating the virtues of meditation for hundreds of years. They unanimously refer to the “stillness within”.
Psalm 119:99 “I have more understanding than all my teachers, for your testimonies are my meditation.”
“In returning and rest shall ye be saved” – Isaiah 30:15
“In tranquillity, in stillness, in the unconditioned, in inaction, we find the levels of the universe, the very constitution of Tao.” – Chuang-Tse, 3rd Century Taoist.
Meditation is a form of prayer that goes beyond words and into the void.
Are you willing to try meditation as a form of prayer?
“Supreme bliss surely cometh to the sage whose mind is thus at peace” – Hinduism
“Suddenly is the soul oned to God when it is truly peaced in itself” – Julian of Norwich
“A peaceful mind is your precious capital” – Sivananda
“Only in stillness, does one have the truth” – Shankaracharya
Other Benefits of Introspection
If you introspect for twenty minutes daily, you will require less sleep, look and feel younger, reduce stress and develop a calmness that you have never experienced before. You will feel closer to your Source because in stillness you strengthen the thread that connects you to “your Creator”.
Believe that higher forces try to reach and help you, so allow them to succeed by dropping all mental barriers.
“Your mental walls are the only obstructions that obstruct Truth’s constant messages of help. The key to this is to silence the mind” – Unknown.
In our chaotic world where we have been taught to equate inaction with being lazy, many people have difficulty ‘doing nothing’ but it is in the stillness of the body and mind that we find answers, that our energy levels increase and that our lives become more balanced and productive.
Don’t be put off by the fact that you are tempted to fidget or get distracted. After some practise, meditation will become your favourite source of relaxation and comfort.
Through introspection, for once you are giving more to the soul than to the body.
In preparation for introspection
The Four Brain Waves that influence our State Of Mind.
Beta State – is the state your brain waves are in during your normal day-to-day activities. It is the fastest brain wave.
Theta State – is the state is experienced during sleep (REM state) and during deep meditation when the person looses all sense of the physical body functions such as breathing and heartbeat. Digestion is slowed down immensely.
Delta State – This is the slowest brain wave. It is experienced in very deep sleep or when the mental and physical planes have been transcended.
For our purpose it is between alpha and theta that we will be working in.
Alpha State – this is the level your brain is in whilst sleeping, during meditation or when lost in creative thought. The brain activity is slowed down and you begin to access your sub-conscious mind.
Be aware of the following:
Invasive thoughts will be diminished and removed with patience and focus.
Allow time for the introspection, twenty minutes is usually enough.
Be prepared for anything to pop into your mind. Know that you are safe and that nothing will happen to you. When you ‘introspect’ you must let go and relax.
When you are relaxed you open yourself to the dropping down into the alpha state of mind.
It is only when you are in the alpha state that you will be most effective in your introspection.
To prepare yourself for the ideal mental state for introspection, I suggest you carry out the following:
Make sure you will not be disturbed and the room you are in is quiet and has plenty of fresh air. See that you are comfortable, either sitting or lying on the floor. Close your eyes.
Thoughts will come to you whilst in introspection that you may want to remember later on. Have a pen and paper ready to jot these down immediately you come out of the alpha state. You may want to use a dictaphone to record your thoughts.
By slowing down your breathing, you slow down the thoughts that bombard your mind. You also lower your brain waves. When you reach the alpha level, your mind will be calm with fewer intrusive thoughts. Your mind will be more receptive to focussing on your process and the receiving of relevant information.
You will now do your first introspection.
Slow your breathing down and once you seem calmer take your mind to a quiet place (a place in nature perhaps), a place without fear, a place without responsibilities. Keep focused on this blissful place.
Starting the Process
Take 6 deep breaths and consciously release tension with each out breath. The deep breathing informs your mind that you are about to enter the alpha state. Only later do you slow your breathing down.
Take your focus to your body and start with your feet working up (one step at a time) to the crown of your head. Relax each foot, each leg, buttocks, etc. Slowly does it. Spend time on relaxing your shoulders and face, both of which retain a lot of tension. The process should take about five minutes.
When at the crown of your head, take 2 more deep breaths and sigh out any tension.
Tell yourself that you are going deeper into relaxation.
At this stage, consciously slow down your breathing and reduce your breath to that of a mere whisper.
When you feel yourself relaxed tell your mind you are going deeper and say, “With each breath I am more relaxed,” whilst at the same time take a few more breaths.
See yourself at the top of a staircase with ten steps. Gently descend one step at a time. Starting from the top, count backwards – “10, I am going deeper into relaxation, 9, I am going deeper into relaxation,” until you reach the bottom.
See yourself walking to another set of steps and do the same again whilst affirming that you are going deeper.
Now you are ready to visualise yourself in the process of working through your chosen topic.
Ask for clarity and relief, whilst every so often reminding yourself that you are going deeper.
If the topic is one where you would like to change a mind set, such as ‘I am confident at work’. See yourself in your work situation oozing confidence. How do you feel being confident? How do your colleagues view your new confident self? Immerse yourself in the experience, whilst repeating ‘I am confident at work’ at least 10 times.
When you are ready, slowly count yourself out from 1-10 as your breathing returns to normal.
Become aware of your body and surroundings, moving your fingers and wriggling your toes.
As you open your eyes, take note of your new refreshed and invigorated state.
Record your impressions:
Some points to remember
There is no hurry. Be patient and go easy on yourself, especially with painful issues. You may need several sessions for a specific topic.
If external thoughts become intrusive, calmly allow them to flow through and out of your mind.
Tackle one topic per session.
If you feel yourself slipping out of the Alpha and back into the Beta state, repeat the last two steps of descending the staircase, whilst affirming that you are relaxing to a deeper level.
If peripheral thoughts associated with your process emerge, follow them and take them to their final conclusion. Then return to the core issue.
At the end of each session, describe your findings in your journal.
Try and do the session at the same time each day. This is your time and if you are consistent it will become easier.
To begin with your mind may wander. Like a young colt it will resist harnessing. Some days will be easier than others. Be patient with yourself, remain calm and determined. Like any skill you will get better with practice. I assure you the effort will be worth it.
To change negative modes of behaviour, you need to repeat positive affirmations at least 10 times per session.
Record future topics that you want to work with..
Tools for processing and how to work through your chosen topics
As you introduce a topic, don’t look for answers straight away. Just get a feel for the subject. Your mind will get on with it in its own good time. Let it search for everything you know about the subject and allow it to linger and massage the topic as required. Go slowly and methodically.
N.B. An important aspect of introspection is ‘the feeling’ you get when you ponder a subject. Take cognisance of‘ ‘the feeling’. Is the feeling one of guilt, anger, hate or remorse? Which area of the body does the feeling sit in? There may be times, when a topic of introspection will be so uncomfortable you may not be able to handle it. If so, back off a bit and think about the uncomfortable feeling. The next time you introspect, re-introduce the subject and you will probably be able to dig a little deeper into it. In time, you will be able to examine and feel it without any anguish. When that happens, you know the process is working and you are healing that aspect.
You will know when you have done enough. Gradually bring your breathing to normal and return to the awareness of your surroundings.
Lists
Make a list of all the issues that you want to meditate on to clear. Your list could include many of the concepts that you will learn about in ‘Know ThySelf’. However, some may be your own personal ‘issues’ that require your immediate attention.
Your lists:
Other thoughts?..
Internalising and Changing Thought Processes
I have been meditating for twenty years and have tried many methods from guided meditations to mantras. They all have their place and are very good for specific purposes. However, if you want to influence your mind to make it work for you, I recommend the above method. Methods that do not examine your issues will not clear them. You will feel great whilst in the meditation but when you come out the guilt, fear and anger will may return.
Reversing an Unhappy Ending – (Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) calls this Change Personal History).
If a past event has bothered you, depending on the issue being reflected on, it may be helpful to imagine a different ending or in the case of severe trauma, a completely different set of circumstances. For example, if you were raped, change the outcome and see yourself, not changing the events (as it did happen), but changing the feelings and pain that resulted from the event. During introspection, run the event as if you are watching a movie. Visualise the circumstances (and feel the feelings that go with it) as you would have wanted them to be, and finish off the visualisation with an uplifting ending. When you do this, you re-programme the mind and release your emotional attachments to the event.
Life Lessons
Life is your most consistent and rewarding teacher
Lessons usually come in the form of painful events, experiences or ways of being. If we don’t develop tools and methods of dealing with these challenging life altering events, we tend to ‘react’ to our circumstances in the following ways:
Stop – The above methods are very important in the identification of your issues. But when visualising, don’t focus on these, rather focus on the opposite, that is the good result, otherwise, you may further entrench the bad habits.
Introspection
Do you think that your life works? Could it be improved? Do any of the above indicators sound familiar to you?
Make yourself comfortable, still your mind into the alpha state and for a ten-minute period, ask yourself if any of the above points apply to you. If so, which ones?
Write down what you discover:
Experience can only be of use when you look at a happening from a different mindset or attitude. It is only when you can see what an experience taught you that you are already beyond the need for that lesson. If you have no clarity as to why something happened to you, you still have more to learn or understand.
Stop – Did you take note of that last point – that for a life to Really work you need a relationship with God, but whilst retaining a positive mindset? Does this make sense to you, or do you think it is rubbish? Record your thoughts in your journal.
Does your life work?
Meet Zelda, who is attractive but not beautiful, slim, and always laughing. On the outside she seems motivated and determined. Her friends say that she is vivacious. Zelda always has a task to do, money to make and a future to grasp. That’s on the outside. The inside tells a different story. Her life does not work – she has little energy and her health could be better, there is no money in her bank account and her relationships with lovers and friends fluctuate from good to stormy. Yet, ‘It was not my fault, is her mantra’.
On the outside she tries to be positive and do the best with what she has, ‘…besides, what other choice do I have? I can’t help it if I am unlucky,’ she tells all.