To the Young Ladies of America, the following sheets are affectionately inscribed.
Convinced of the many advantages of a good education, and the importance of improving those advantages; or of counterbalancing the want of them by exerting the mental powers which nature has bestowed; sensible, too, that the foundation of a useful and happy life must be laid in youth, and that much depends on the early infusion of virtuous principles into the docile mind, the author has employed a part of her leisure hours in collecting and arranging her ideas on the subject of female deportment.
How far she has succeeded in her design, the voice of a candid public will pronounce.
On the delightful margin of the Merrimac, in one of the most pleasant and beautiful situations, which that fertile and healthful part of America affords, lived Mrs. Williams, the virtuous relict of a respectable clergyman.
She had two daughters, lovely and promising as ever parent could boast.
Mrs. Williams’ circumstances were easy. She possessed a little patrimony, to which she retired, after her husband’s decease; but a desire of preserving this for her children, and a wish to promote their advantage and enlarge their society, induced her to open a Boarding School.
As she had an eye, no less to the social pleasure, than to the pecuniary profit of the undertaking, she admitted only seven, at a time, to the privilege of her tuition.
These were all young ladies, who had previously received the first rudiments of learning, and been initiated into the polite accomplishments, which embellish virtue and soften the cares of human life. They had generally lived in the metropolis, and had acquired the graces of a fashionable deportment; but they possessed different tempers and dispositions, which had been variously, and, in some respects, erroneously managed.
To cultivate the expanding flowers, and to prune the juvenile eccentricities, which were disseminated among these tender plants; or, to speak without a figure, to extend and purify their ideas, to elevate and refine their affections, to govern and direct their passions, required an eye, watchful, and a hand, skilful as those of the judicious Mrs. Williams.
While her judgment and prudence aided the useful acquisitions of the mind, a sprightly fancy and a cheerful disposition, regulated by experience and discretion, qualified her to enter, at once, with becoming dignity and condescending ease, into all their concerns; to participate their pleasures; while, with candor and mildness, she reproved their errors, detected their follies, and facilitated their amendment.
As the young ladies had finished their school education, before Mrs. Williams received them to her mansion, her instructions were more especially designed to polish the mental part, to call forth the dormant virtues, to unite and arrange the charms of person and mind, to inspire a due sense of decorum and propriety, and to instil such principles of piety, morality, benevolence, prudence and economy, as might be useful through life.
Their time was, accordingly, disposed in a manner most conducive to the attainment of these objects. Every part of it was employed to some valuable purpose; “for idleness,” Mrs. Williams observed, “is the rust of the mind.”
Whatever tended to enlarge, inform, improve, or amuse, she supposed worthy their attention.
She particularly endeavored to domesticate them; to turn their thoughts to the beneficial and necessary qualifications of private life; often inculcating, that
and laboring to convince them of the utter insignificance and uselessness of that part of the sex, who are
Early rising she recommended, both by precept and example. This, she said, would not only promote their health, but render them mistresses of many hours, which must otherwise be lost in enervating sloth and inaction. “And should we,” continued she, “who have so much cause for exertion, thus sacrifice the best part of our time?”
Another laudable practice of Mrs. Williams, was perfect regularity in the government of her pupils, and in the arrangement of their daily exercises. “When,” said she, “we observe the order of the natural world, and admire the consistency and harmony of every part, we may hence derive a lesson, for the regulation of our conduct, in the sphere assigned to us.”
Pursuant to this plan of operation, the young ladies arose at five; from which they had two hours at their own disposal, till the bell summoned them at seven, to the hall, where, the ceremonies of the morning salutation over, they breakfasted together; their repast being seasoned with the unrestrained effusions of good humor and sociability. On these occasions, Mrs. Williams suspended the authority of the matron, that, by accustoming her pupils to familiarity in her presence, they might be free from restraint; and, feeling perfectly easy and unawed, appear in their genuine characters. By this means she had an opportunity of observing any indecorum of behavior, or wrong bias; which she kept in mind, till a proper time to mention, and remonstrate against it; a method, the salutary effects of which were visible in the daily improvement of her pupils.
The breakfast table removed, each took her needle-work, except one, who read some amusing and instructive book, for the benefit and entertainment of the rest. The subject was selected by Mrs. Williams, who conferred the reading upon them in rotation.
At twelve o’clock, they were dismissed till one, when dinner again called them together, which was conducted in the same manner as the morning repast.
Having resumed their occupations, the reader of the day produced some piece of her own composition, either in prose, or verse, according to her inclination, as a specimen of her genius and improvement. This being submitted to Mrs. Williams’ inspection, and the candid perusal and criticism of her companions; and the subject canvassed with great freedom of opinion, they withdrew from the tasks of the day to seek that relaxation and amusement, which each preferred. No innocent gratification was denied them. The sprightly dance, the sentimental song, and indeed every species of pastime, consistent with the decorum of the sex, was encouraged, as tending to health, cheerfulness, and alacrity.
In these pleasing pursuits and enjoyments, the present class of happy companions had nearly completed the term allotted them by their parents, and were soon to leave the peaceful shades in which they delighted, when being assembled on the Monday morning of their last week, their revered Preceptress thus accosted them:
“As the period is approaching, my dear pupils, when I must resign your society, and quit the important charge of instructer and friend, which I have sustained with so much pleasure, and, I trust, with some degree of fidelity, I shall sum up the counsels, admonitions, and advice, which I have frequently inculcated, and endeavor to impress them on your minds, as my valedictory address. For this purpose, during this last week of your residence with me, I shall dispense with your usual exercises, and substitute a collection of my own sentiments, enforced by the pathos of the occasion.
“Your docility, and cheerful diligence in attending to my instructions; your modest, affectionate, and respectful behavior, together with the laudable progress you have made in every branch, which you have pursued, have well rewarded my care, and engaged my approbation and love. To me, therefore, a separation will be painful. To you the period is important. It is a period, which, while it relieves you from the confinement of scholastic rules, introduces you to new scenes of cares, of pleasures, of trials, and of temptations, which will call for the exercise of every virtue, and afford opportunity for improving the endowments, both natural and acquired, which you possess. Think not then, that your emancipation from schools, gives you liberty to neglect the advantages which you have received from them. The obligations under which you are laid to your parents for the education they have given you, require a diligent improvement of every talent committed to your trust.
“Of needle-work you are complete mistresses, from the most delicate and highly finished, to the most ordinary, though perhaps not less useful, economy of mending and making the coarser garments of family use. Many, I am aware, suppose this last a species of learning, which is beneath the attention of a lady: but Clara will tell you how valuable it has proved to her; and how valuable it may prove to you.
“Nursed in the lap of affluence, and accustomed to unbounded expense, Clara little thought, at your age, that she should ever depend on her needle for the livelihood and decent appearance of a rising family. A discreet and prudent mother early inculcated the lessons of industry and economy, which she now practices; and taught her that the knowledge could be of no disservice, though she never had occasion for it. She married with the brightest prospects. But a series of unavoidable disasters, such as no human wisdom could foresee or prevent, reduced her to narrow circumstances; and, to complete her misfortune, she was left a widow with four small children. Her parents were in the grave; her patrimony was gone! In this exigence what was her resource? Not fruitless lamentations, and unavailing complaints. She immediately summoned her resolution; and by the use of her needle has ever since supported herself and family with decency, and been highly respected for her prudent exertions and exemplary industry. Directly the reverse of this amiable character is that of Belinda. She was educated in the same way with Clara; the same schools gave them tuition; and similar prospects awaited their entrance into life. Calamities attended the progress of each; but different as their tempers and dispositions was their conduct under them. The falling fortunes of Clara were awhile suspended by her discretion and frugality; while the ruin of Belinda was hastened by her extravagance, dissipation, and idleness. View them, now, in their reduced state! Neatness, cheerfulness, and activity preside in the dwelling of Clara; negligence, peevishness, and sloth are legibly stamped on that of Belinda. The ear is pained by her complaints of poverty; the eye is disgusted by her slatternly appearance, and ostentatious display of the tattered remnants of finery, which bespeak the pride and indolence of their owner; who will neither convert them into more comfortable garments, nor, by repairing, render them becoming.
“I hope, however, that occasions like these may never call for your exertions. But there may be cases, when, to know the use of your needles will answer important purposes, even in an exalted station, and amidst the splendor of affluence and plenty.
“Matilda dignified a princely fortune by the exercise of every virtue which can adorn a lady. Among these, charity shone conspicuous. Her maid said to her, one day, Madam, would you have me lay aside these cast-clothes for some poor person? Yes, replied Matilda; but sit down, and mend them first. Don’t you see they need it? Why, Madam, rejoined the girl, is it not enough for you to give them away? I should think the least they can do is to mend them for themselves! In that case, said Matilda, my bounty would be greatly diminished. People, who need charity have not the necessary materials for putting such articles into repair; and should I furnish them, perhaps they have never been taught to use their needles. No more have I, returned the maid. Have you not? said Matilda. Well then, sit down, and I will direct your ingenuity upon these clothes. By this mean you may learn a very useful lesson, I assure you; a lesson, which by practising for yourself, will enable you to lay up part of your wages against the time when sickness or old age shall take you from your labors.
“Such examples of condescension and benevolence to inferiors, are of more real and lasting use than pounds prodigally bestowed.
“Do you seek higher testimonies of the honor and utility of this employment? You may collect many from the histories which you have read during the last year. Among the Romans, and several other nations of antiquity, a scarf, wrought by the needle of a favorite fair, was received as an honorable token of respect, and improved as an invincible stimulus to heroic deeds. Ladies of the first rank and station considered it as no derogation from the dignity or delicacy of their character, to make their own apparel, and that of their families. The virtuous Panthea, when her husband was going to fight in the cause of Cyrus, her generous deliverer, magnificently adorned his person, and decorated his armor with her own needle-work.
“We ought never to be idle. No moment should be unoccupied. Some employment, salutary, either to body or mind, or both, should be constantly pursued; and the needle is always at hand to supply the want of other avocations. The listless vacuity, which some young ladies indulge, renders them extremely unhappy, though they are insensible of the cause and seek to beguile the time in frivolous amusements.
“A still more endearing motive remains to be suggested; and that is the pleasure, which your accomplishments in this ornamental and useful art must afford your parents; and the pain, which your neglect of it hereafter must occasion them.
“But your faithful and assiduous improvement of time, since you have been with me, is a sure pledge of your perseverance in the path of duty, and your progress in every virtue. I trust, therefore, that what I have said will be engraved on your memories; and that some useful ideas will be selected by each of you for your future advantage.
“Your minds are a good soil; and may I not flatter myself, that the seeds of instruction which I have sown, will spring up, and yield fruit abundantly?’”
With one voice, they most affectionately assured Mrs. Williams, that it should be their daily study to profit by her lessons; and withdrew.
Being assembled, this afternoon, Mrs. Williams thus resumed her discourse.
“Reading is so common a part of education, that the value of it is not duly estimated; nor the manner of performing it, sufficiently attended to. It is not the mere propriety of pronunciation, accent, and cadence, which constitutes good reading. You must enter into the spirit of the subject, and feel interested in the matter, before you can profit by the exercise.
“But you are so well acquainted with the manner of reading, that the quality of books most worthy of your perusal is the only point on which I need to enlarge.
“Romances, the taste of former times, are now so far out of vogue, that it is hardly necessary to warn you against them. They exhibit the spirit of chivalry, knight-errantry, and extravagant folly, which prevailed in the age they depict. But they are not interesting; nor can they be pleasing to the correct taste and refined delicacy of the present day.
“Novels, are the favorite and the most dangerous kind of reading, now adopted by the generality of young ladies. I say dangerous, because the influence, which, with very few exceptions, they must have upon the passions of youth, bears an unfavorable aspect on their purity and virtue. The style in which they are written is commonly captivating; and the luxuriance of the descriptions with which they abound, extremely agreeable to the sprightly fancy, and high expectations of the inexperienced and unreflecting. Their romantic pictures of love, beauty, and magnificence, fill the imagination with ideas which lead to impure desires, a vanity of exterior charms, and a fondness for show and dissipation, by no means consistent with that simplicity, modesty, and chastity, which should be the constant inmates of the female breast. They often pervert the judgment, mislead the affections, and blind the understanding.
“A melancholy example of this sort is exhibited in Juliana. Juliana was the only daughter of a wealthy merchant, who grudged no expense which could please or embellish his darling child. He, however, possessed neither leisure nor abilities ‘to teach the young idea how to shoot;’ but thought it sufficient that he gave her every advantage, which could be derived from the various schools, to which she was consigned. She had a brilliant fancy, and a fondness for books, which, properly directed, might have proved of great use to her. But, having no better principles instilled into her mind, she indulged herself in the unlimited reading of novels, and every light publication which a circulating library could furnish.
“Hence her imagination took wing, and carried her far above the scenes of common life. The excessive refinement of her mind admitted no ordinary amusements or avocations. Plain truth from her own sex was an insult; and from the other, nothing less than adoration would satisfy her unbounded vanity. Her beauty (of which she really had a considerable share) and the large fortune which she would probably inherit, gained her many admirers; some of whom were men of unquestionable merit. But a sober, rational courtship could not answer her ideas of love and gallantry. The swain, who would not die for her, she deemed unworthy of notice.
“Her father strongly recommended a gentleman, as well calculated, in his opinion, to make her happy, and as having his entire approbation; but she rejected him with disdain, though she could produce no one objection against his person, or character.
“Her father acquiesced; expressing, however, his regret at the mistaken notions she had imbibed; and warning her most pathetically against the indulgence of so romantic a disposition; yet all in vain. He was considered as an illiterate plodder after wealth, which she had a right to bestow as she pleased.
“At last the lovely youth whom she had so long contemplated, made his appearance. A military captain entered the town on the recruiting service. Young, handsome, easy, bold and assuming; with all the bon ton of the coxcomb, and all the insolence of the novice. He saw Juliana; he sacrificed to her charms, and conquered. She could not resist the allurements of his gallantry. His affectation of dying love was received with apparent pleasure; while art and duplicity took advantage of her weakness, to precipitate her into engagements to pity and relieve him. Her friends saw her danger, and warmly remonstrated against her imprudent conduct, in receiving the addresses of a man, destitute of property to support her, and void of every kind of personal merit. Her father entreated and implored the rejection of her lover, till, finding every other method vain, he at length resolutely forbade him the house, and his daughter’s company. This was viewed as persecution; and, consistently with her sentiments of adventurous love, a clandestine amour was commenced. Her father surprised them together; and, enraged at their disgraceful intrigue, seized the captain, and endeavored to turn him out of doors. He violently resented this ungentlemanlike treatment, as he termed it, and defended himself with his sword. The old gentleman received a slight wound in the scuffle; but accomplished his purpose. Juliana was terrified at this rencounter, and, dreading her father’s displeasure, ran out with her paramour. His lodgings were near, and thither, favored by the darkness of the night, he instantly led her. She involuntarily followed him, without considering the impropriety of her conduct. Here he drew his sword, and, throwing himself at her feet, professed his despair, and declared himself resolved to put an immediate end to his life. She endeavored to reason him into calmness; but in vain. He was sensible, that, if he now relinquished her to her father, he should lose her forever. His apparent agony overcame her, and she gave him her hand.
“Her father was almost distracted at her elopement. He traced her steps, and, following her to the house, condescended to soothe her with parental kindness; and promised her pardon and continued affection, if she would renounce her worthless lover, and return. She confessed it was too late; that she was his wife.
“Petrified with astonishment, he looked at her, for some time, with speechless grief; and, showing his arm, bound up with the wound he had received, left her with every token of anguish and indignation!
“When the fever of passion had abated, a returning sense of duty in Juliana, and, in the captain, the fear of losing the property which he sought, induced them to seek a reconciliation, and make submissive efforts to obtain it. But her father was too highly incensed to grant it to him, on any terms; or to her, on any other than the utter rejection of her unworthy companion. These terms were not complied with.
“Sorrow and vexation preyed so deeply upon the mind of this afflicted parent, that they brought on a rapid decline; and he died without again seeing his undutiful and ruined daughter. His estate was divided between Juliana and her four brothers. Her portion was received by her husband, and soon spent in dissipation and excess. Having rioted on the fortune of his wife, while she often pined at home for want of the common necessaries of life, he left her, to join his regiment, promising remittances from time to time, for her support. This promise, however, was but ill performed; and she now feels the dreadful effects of her folly, in the accumulated ills of poverty and neglect. Yet she still cherishes the most passionate fondness for what has proved her bane. A friend called to see her, not long since, and found her the emblem of wretchedness and sloth. Her emaciated form, her squalid appearance, the disorder of her house, and her tattered raiment, bespoke the shameful negligence of the owner. Yet she was sitting with a novel in her hand, over which she had apparently been weeping. She expatiated largely on the tale it contained, while her children, who exhibited a picture of real woe, engaged not her attention. Her friend enquired how she could be thus interested and distressed by mere fiction, while every thing about her was calculated to arouse the keenest feelings of her soul! She coolly replied, I have fortitude sufficient to support my own calamity, but I must sympathize with the heroine of adversity. I have not lost my sensibility with my fortune. My only luxury is now imagination! How ill-timed, and how improperly exerted, was this kind of sensibility, in Juliana! Where, and what was her sensibility, when she disobeyed an indulgent parent, sacrificed her reputation, and threw herself into the arms of a worthless man for protection—from what? from the kindness and love of her best friends!
“But I would not be understood to condemn all novels indiscriminately; though great prudence is necessary to make a useful selection. Some of them are fraught with sentiment; convey lessons for moral improvement; and exhibit striking pictures of virtue rewarded; and of vice, folly, and indiscretion punished; which may prove encouragements to imitate, or warnings to avoid similar practices. I shall not descend to particulars. Those, which are sanctioned by the general voice of delicacy and refinement, may be allowed a reading; yet none should engross your minds, to the neglect of more important objects; nor be suffered to monopolize too large a portion of your time.
“Novels are a kind of light reading, on which the imagination feasts, while the more substantial food which is requisite to the nourishment of the understanding, is either untasted or undigested. Imagination is a sportive faculty, which should be curbed by the reins of prudence and judgment. Its sallies are delightful in youth, provided they be not too excursive.
“Poetry is, by some, ranked with novels; but I think injudiciously. Good poetry is certainly a sublime source of entertainment and instruction. What music is to the ear, poetry is to the heart. There must, indeed, be a natural taste for it, before it can be highly relished or enjoyed; and this taste, whereever it exists, should be cultivated. I know of no kind of reading more richly formed for the mental repast of a liberal and polished young lady, than the poetical productions of true genius. The trifling and indelicate cantos of ordinary witlings, and every day poetasters, are unworthy your attention. But the species of poetry which I now recommend, is peculiarly adapted to soften the passions, excite sympathy, and meliorate the affections. It soothes the jarring cares of life, and, pervading the secret recesses of the soul, serves to rouse and animate its dormant powers.
“Many essays, written by monitors of both sexes, are extant, which you may find profitable and pleasing, both in youth and more advanced age. Among the foremost of these, I mention Mrs. Chapone’s letters to her niece, which contain a valuable treasure of information and advice.
“But among your hours devoted to reading, history must not be without a place. Here an extensive field of ages and generations, which have gone before you, is opened to your view. Here your curiosity may be gratified by a retrospection of events, which, by conducting your thoughts to remotest climes and periods, interests and enlarges the mind. Here the various revolutions, the rise, fall, and dismemberment of ancient kingdoms and states may be traced to the different springs of action, in which they originated. Hence you may gain a competent acquaintance with human nature in all its modifications, from the most rude and barbarous, to the most civilized and polished stages of society. This is a species of knowledge, which will not only be of constant use to you, in the government of your own temper and manners, but highly ornamental in your intercourse with the polite and learned world.