cover.jpg

MY
TRUTH

DON BENJAMIN

Don B, INC

My Truth

Edited by: Jerra Mitchell

Published by: Don B, INC

CONTENTS

INTRODUCTION

  1. IT’S AT THE ROOT
  2. YOU’RE THE FRUIT
  3. HURT PEOPLE HURT PEOPLE
  4. FORGIVE
  5. LETTER TO MY DAD
  6. MAKE A CHOICE
  7. DEAR FUTURE WIFEY
  8. BE THE MAN YOU WISH RAISED YOU
  9. GET HELP
  10. YOU ARE THE MASTER OF YOUR OWN LIFE
  11. THE SPOTLIGHT IS BRIGHT
  12. YOUR BOYS CAN WAIT
  13. LETTER TO GOD

INTRODUCTION

It’s 1am on March 18, 2020 - the first day of the COVID-19 lockdown in LA. I’m laying down on my mom’s couch scrolling thru Instagram, bored out of my mind, and it hit me. I want to write my first book! I want to let people in on my life and my journey. Not only that, I want to use my voice to help as many people as I know possible. You’re probably wondering, “Help with what?” Well, I want to help the so-called men in the world really become MEN! To help every guy out there really reach MANHOOD. Not just help the men, I also want the women to know it’s possible for a guy to pull his own head out of his butt, get it together, and be a man. There is hope ladies. I want to give you a glimpse of my life. The struggle, the glory, the pain I’ve felt, and the pain I’ve caused. The wins, and the losses. My interpretation of what it is really like to step up and be a MAN.

Now, I’m pretty sure most people that follow me on social media don’t know my story at all, or may not ever care to. Other people may not even have a clue who I am, other than a familiar face in the media. Most people see a fashion model and have no idea the journey it took to get where I am. You’re probably thinking, “What kind of journey does it take to become a model? You look good your whole life, then you start modeling. If only it were that easy.” You know what is funny? I’ve literally had people tell me, “Don’t say anything. Just sit there and look pretty.” That’s insensitive as hell, right? All good...but you know what, that’s not me, God has put a bigger purpose on my life, and I’ve known it since as far back as I can remember. Purpose to me isn’t just what we choose to do in our career, but instead what we choose to do with our lives that will impact the world with who we become in our career. As a kid, I knew for a fact I would become a professional basketball player. Quite honestly, I think that is most boy’s dream who were raised in the inner city. Well, by the time high school graduation rolled around, I realized those chances were about as slim as me. And if you know me, you know how slim I am. So, I guess professional baller isn’t part of God’s purpose for me, huh? Good news is it didn’t take long after that for God to speak to me and let me know what’s next for me. I got a call from my cousin in California to come out and visit for the holidays. The minute I landed, I knew that this is where I needed to be! I never knew what or how I would impact the world. Honestly, I’m not sure if anyone that has made an impact on the world really knew they were going to do it. They just knew they had to follow their heart.

So, I decided I was going to pack up and move to LA to try my luck in the entertainment industry. Now, mind you, I gave my life to God when I was young. I believe in the Lord and I would go to church when I could, but I know I’ve tip-toed on the line of what I can get away with in God’s eyes. I know we all do some things in the heat of the moment where we have to stop and ask ourselves, “Is this crossing the line?” We may also say to ourselves, “I just want to have fun, or I gotta do what I gotta do to survive.” I know we like to see what sins we can get away with before it eats our soul up completely. Well, Hollywood will push you to the limits with every soul test. And I was going to learn about it first-hand. The parties, the drinking, the drugs, and the women. For me, drugs were never an issue, growing up seeing my father addicted to crack pushed me far away from ever wanting to touch any drug. But, I did fall victim to alcohol and a love for women. I wouldn’t say I was addicted to women, but now that I’ve taken counseling, I realized I had a void from my father not being around much that was filled by the attention of women. Fortunately, God has allowed me to stay on the straight and narrow path for my life up until this point. But the majority of my life, I’ve always had an issue staying committed in a relationship and letting my lack of discipline stunt my growth as a man. I was never taught commitment in a relationship. I came up in a single parent household. I watched my mother be in and out of relationships. Some relationships were more unstable than others. My father wasn’t around much due to the drug addiction. All my boys had no fathers around either. As I got older, all I learned was the more girls you have, the cooler you are, or the more you are a man. When I did get to hang with my dad, it wasn’t always the best situation for a kid. And as I got older my father would always ask about the girls I had. If I had any girlfriends, plural. Maybe subconsciously, that sent me on a mission to be with different women while searching for his approval.

On my journey for success I’ve been a hard worker, but could never really discipline myself 100% all the time. And as I got older, I’ve learned that most - if not all - men, that discipline starts with controlling our urge for women. I’ve had 3 long-term relationships and haven’t been faithful in any of them. My first 2 didn’t end due to infidelity, but they surely didn’t stay strong because of it. The last relationship did however end from infidelity. And as crazy as it sounds, it was the biggest blessing in my life. Not saying it was a blessing to lose the woman of my dreams, but to wake up and realize right in time to turn my life around, man up, and take the necessary steps to do what I have to do to learn what it really is to become a man. To teach other men that you can be faithful. You can be disciplined. You can be face-to-face with temptation and come out on top. When you choose that path, not only will you stop hurting the people that mean the most to you, but e else in life will flow better. All of your blessings will flourish. You will be able to put all of your energy into what you really want out of it, and not let women distract you. In this book, I will let you in on my life and how I got to where I am today, and share my insights on what it takes to be a REAL MAN.

CHAPTER ONE

IT’S AT THE ROOT